Thinking of Turning Your Hobby Into a Business? Read This First

Photo: Anna Shvets for Pexels

Many people have hobbies they believe could be successful business ventures. Dreaming big is great, but sometimes we have to be practical. Starting a business is harder than it seems and requires lots of planning and risk-taking. Lots.

Unfortunately, no matter what products you create or services you can offer, you can’t predict the future. Before turning your hobby into a business, it’s important to sit down and think about all of the things that go into creating a successful company.

Here are a few things to consider before starting your own business…

Funding

Before you begin your business, you have to think about how you’re going to fund it. While you may not need lots of money right away, you need to be prepared for growth and potential emergencies. Whether you have investors or you’ve saved your own money, you’ll need to have funds readily available for anytime you may need it.

You can keep your day job in the beginning. This will ensure you have something to fall back on should your endeavor not pan out as you had expected.

Motivation

You have to be able to take the initiative and keep yourself motivated every single day if you’re going to turn your hobby into a business. Expect daily work and long hours—building a brand is hard work.

You’ll also have to learn the ins and outs of business—from account management to marketing initiatives. If you’re starting with less funding, you’ll need to teach yourself all of these different aspects. You might even consider taking a business course at your local college to get started.

If you can afford to hire a professional team, first hire people who can help you with marketing. Then, hire people to help you with whatever your weak spots may be or the areas where you have the least experience.

Branding

Your brand is what will make your products stand out from the crowd. Who you are is important to the public. It’s what helps them decide whether or not to work with you and buy your products. This is where your company mission is important. It shares your goals and values with prospective customers and employees.

Branding is also what helps people recognize and remember you. The images and designs you use on your products, website, business cards, and other marketing materials will make people recognize your brand. Be consistent in designing your website, marketing collateral, and other representations of your brand.

Networking

It’s important to network and meet people in your industry. These people will help you strengthen and expand your business.

While networking, you can find public relations contacts and media professionals to help market your business and manufacturers who can help you develop your products for less. You can also meet buyers face-to-face, which is always an advantage for fostering new wholesale relationships.

Networking takes communication skills, so it’s important to work on getting comfortable with public speaking and to learn how to talk to other professionals. If you’re initially uncomfortable in social situations, don’t worry. It gets easier. The more experience you have, the sooner you’ll develop these skills.

Professional Support

You’ll probably be working alone when you launch. However, as you expand and start to make a profit, it will be time to hire professionals like lawyers and accountants to help keep your business afloat.

Your attorney will be one of your most important resources in business. Your lawyer will help with trademarks, contracts, copyrights, incorporating your business, and more.

An accountant will also be vital, especially when tax season comes around. Your accountant can help you save money with exemptions and make sure all of your accounts are up to speed. He or she can also provide solutions should any financial issues arise.

Patience and Commitment

You have to be committed and patient to sustain a successful business. You can no longer treat your new business like a hobby- you have to work every day. Once you’ve launched, you’ll be working on this business full time, every day… for years. You have to be excited, prepared, and completely devoted to find success.

That said, we’re human! It’s normal to get frustrated sometimes when you’re running your own business. Stay level-headed when issues arise and remember success doesn’t happen overnight.

About the Author: Syama Meagher is a CEO and retail strategist who works with startup, growth stage, and enterprise retail businesses. The Scaling Retail founder has worked for Gucci, Barneys New York, Macy’s and more. For more information, visit Scaling Retail or email hello@scalingretail.com.

This post was originally published on May 18, 2019, and has since been updated.

MORE ON THE BLOG

We Need to Talk: I Earn More Than My Partner

The wage gap is a battle that’s yet to be won, but there are many women who are bringing home more bacon than their significant others. 

Married women are more likely than ever before to out-earn their husbands. According to a Pew study in 1960 just about 4% of married women were the primary provider in their family, whereas in 2013 that percentage increased by 20%. Rising education and employment levels contribute to this stat.

Despite the upswing in changes, the same study found that 74% of adults say that the increase in working women, particularly working mothers, has made it harder to raise children and harder for marriages to succeed. 

So, we need to talk. We chatted anonymously with three women who are primary household breadwinners in various life stages about how they and their partners really feel about earning less. 

A single mom in a relationship. 

A married woman with two kids. 

And a VP living with her fiancé. 

Does earning more than your significant other affect your relationship?

Single mom: It comes in waves, honestly. There are some days when I can tell he’s uncomfortable with my success or that I don’t “need” him in the traditional sense. 

Married woman: At this point, no. But I wasn’t always earning more so that power switch was difficult to get used to. That’s not to say money equals power, but for a long time the person in charge of the bank account was the one making all the decisions. In most cases, that was a man. Banks wouldn’t even loan women money or let them sign for their own credit cards in the ‘70s. I don’t know why we expect this not to be difficult for men. They’ve been told and conditioned to behave one way— and there is a shift among Millennials, sure, but change is uncomfortable. If you watched your parents behave one way or the other it’s hard to break from that mindset.  

VP: This is tough because he’s also successful. When I was dating there were men who wanted a woman in a more traditional role. Logical or not, there are men who want to wear those proverbial pants. I get it, I like wearing the pants too. But I’d like to think that part of the reason we’re getting married is because he values my work ethic and my success. I’d like to think it affects my relationship in a positive way. He supports me and values me. 

Do you think men in general are uncomfortable with a female breadwinner?

Married woman: Yes. Like I said before this is slow shift. A long rolling after-shock. Things are moving and shaking, but in the process books are going to fall off the shelves and jars in the pantry will break. Nothing changes without a little— or a lot — of discomfort. 

Single mom: In general I don't think people want to be in relationships where there is a power play happening. I can only speak to my relationship but my boyfriend doesn’t believe that income reflects power in a relationship. I agree with him and at the same time I can’t help but wonder— if I’m being REALLY honest— he would feel the same way if he made more money. Money is weird. It makes men and women act weird. I don’t know any other way to explain it. 

VP: We’re slowly moving out of the mindset that men are the providers and women are caregivers. There is no longer a “traditional” role. I don’t even know what that would look like— and that's confusing to people. Men and women. Confusion and uncomfortable generally go hand-in-hand. We’re all testing out new models and there’s no one person to point to and say, "they did it right!" And when we do point to a couple that “did it right,” it’s usually someone’s grandparents who have been married for 50 years and held very “traditional” roles. Which, again, is confusing, because most people don’t want what their grandparents had. 

"There is no longer a 'traditional' role and that's confusing to people." 

Tweet this. 

Who pays when you go out to dinner? Or when you want to go on a vacation your partner can’t afford?

Single mom: We pay for what we can afford. And if one of us is uncomfortable, we say something. Communication is more important than who earns what. That’s a really annoying PC answer, but it’s also the truth. If we go out to dinner 10 nights and I’ve paid for 9 because I can afford it, I’ll say something. I expect an effort to be made on his part in ways that he can contribute. There are ways to support someone that are not financial. When one person isn’t making an effort, that’s a bigger problem than what’s in your bank account. 

Married woman: I think it’s different when you’re married. Most successful couples have clearly defined financial roles and decide how they are going to split finances. My parents never fought about money because they had independent accounts and one account they contributed to that was a percentage of their earnings, not a lump sum. There’s no tit for tat in marriage and when there is, you’re probably getting divorced. You need to throw this notion of fair out the window. Be fair with your heart if you want your love to last. 

VP: At the end of the day, if dinner is my suggestion or I’m taking him on a date, I pay. And vice versa. Does it work out to be an even split? No and I’m OK with that. MOST of the time. My love for him isn’t based in dollars. That doesn’t mean that emotions and money never get crossed. Somewhere at the intersection of the two there are arguments, feelings that get hurt, resentments. To pretend they are independent of each other would be over-simplifying. 

Do you think women think of their income as “theirs,” where men have to think of their income as “ours?” 

Married woman: Yes. There is a double standard 100%. Since women still earn less on the man’s dollar and are just now in the last decade or so occupying positions always held by men, I think there is this need to hoard or hold onto their income. We didn’t always have the opportunity to make money, so there’s an innate desire to keep it. Is that right? I don’t know. Women still feel the need to protect themselves. 

VP: These are hard questions because I have to be honest about my relationship to gender roles. I want to be breadwinner. I like it. At the same time, I still like a man to open my door and take me on a date, and I don’t know, plunge the toilet. Men are expected to share more than women and I think women like it that way, without always reciprocating. 

"I want to be the breadwinner, and at the same time, have the man to take me on a date." 

Single mom: Ah. What’s yours is mine, and what’s mine is mine. Yeah, there’s definitely some of that going on. I’ve talked to many of my friends about this, who are also higher or relatively equal earners. There are mixed feelings. Nothing is ever going to be an equal down-the-middle split. If anything, I think we should take this as a lesson that shifting roles are hard for both genders and perhaps be a little less angry when it doesn’t come easy. That’s not a particularly feminist thing to say. 

Do you feel more in control in the relationship because you earn more money?

Single mom: I feel more in control of my own life. I feel able and competent which, in turn, creates a real confidence in me that I think is attractive to certain men. I don’t need to be in control of someone else, but I do like being in control of my own life. Knowing that if we broke up, I’d still be OK, able to pay my rent, feed my kid, go on small vacations. I don’t have a ton of expendable income, but I do fine on my own. I think that is empowering, more so than having “control” over another person. I don’t feel better than him because I earn more, I simply feel good about myself. 

"I don’t feel better than him because I earn more, I simply feel good about myself." 

Tweet this. 

VP: I don’t think I’ve ever admitted this out loud but, yes. I’m sure that has to do with the relationship dynamics I witnessed between my parents. I had a stay-at-home mom and as much of a job as that is, you don’t earn anything. You’re essentially paid by your husband to take care of the kids and the home. For lack of a better term, you’re a kept woman. I was never going to be for keeping, and for better or worse, money is a part of that. 

Married woman: If I was younger I might feel that way, but marriage is give and take, push and pull, and I know at any point the tables could turn. I would never want him to make me feel lesser than because I lost my job, or got fired, or who knows, life is messy. Money is complicated. Gender roles are complicated. Relationships and marriage, even more complicated. Put it all in a pot and there are good days and fucking god-awful ones. Sometimes that has to do with the all mighty dollar, but if you think you’re in control because you have more money, you should be single. 

Do you make more than your partners? Sound-off in the comments below and join the convo. 

More from our blog: 

Weed Need to Talk: I Had an Unconventional & Controversial Job

We Need to Talk is a bi-monthly, anonymous series, where contributors share stories about business, life, and the stuff we don't talk about.

Mary Jane. Mother plant. Only female plants make the buds needed to get you buzzed. So it seems natural that women could dominate the billion dollar marijuana industry. 

In 1996 California was the first state to allow the medical use of marijuana with the passing of Prop 215. There are now five states, Alaska, Colorado, Oregon, Washington State, as well as Washington, DC which have legalized recreational, as well as medical, marijuana. 20 more states have legalized medical Mary Jane. It's an incredibly lucrative business, both for health and fiscal purposes, but in 2004 there weren't a lot of women working as growers. 

We caught up with one of the women in CA who went from grunt to dealing with large volume dispensaries to chat herb and business. 

What was your role in the business?

I was green and super young when I started. At the beginning it was all about shadowing my business partners who were very knowledgeable, discreet, and a little intimidating. So like any job I did the grunt work: potting, balancing the PH water levels, feeding, spraying, plant spotting, testing equipment and cleaning water wells.  

As we grew into the farm I managed the life-cycle of the plants from babies to curated buds. Every eight weeks we had a new crop but every five weeks we were seeding for the next round. It goes quickly and like any business you're constantly managing what's going out and what's growing up. Plant production is a lot like event production. High stress, lots of moving pieces and equipment, and big pay days! 

"Plant production is a lot like event production. High stress, lots of moving pieces and equipment, and big pay days!"

Tweet this. 

Six months into the business I was also managing the sales. Our business partner made some initial connections but since we all had the same product I started venturing out. I was eager, young, and a little naive, but it played well into my sales. I hit the pavement hard. I walked into dispensaries showed them samples, gave them notes, and high balled the product. Being a young and attractive lady in a male-dominated industry, I rocked at sales! Before long I did sales trips on my own and negotiated with large volume dispensaries in Oakland, LA, and SF. 

How did you get into it?

Love! Love at first sight kind of love. My friend dragged me to a house party and the moment I locked eyes with this man we were hooked. But our romance was suppose to be quick since I was moving to NYC in five weeks. I told him not to fall in love.... I ended up leaving but only got as far as Santa Fe when he sent me an email and a business plan in Excel. He laid out his plan to build a farm, make loads of cash and travel the world with me. He was smitten and I was intrigued. 

I put NYC on hold and flew back to him and started what was the beginning of an incredible journey and the story that is my life.  

What kept you involved?

Love, money, and seeing the world! I was 22, it was 2004 and I had never considered I could be a self-made woman. I am fiercely independent so the appeal of creating my own lifestyle and product at such a young age was an incredible opportunity.

We both developed side projects throughout our partnership which helped with the stress and anxiety of our business.  As a freelance florist I was exposed to a new side of luxury and I was hooked. Flowers and event design were ultimately the driving force to me leaving the farm business. 

Was there any point where you were worried about the legality of what you were doing?

Yes and no!

No, because we always stayed within our permit limits when growing. But everything else we dealt with was like living in a constant state of extreme paranoia! 

Were there any ‘oh sh*t’ moments? I’m about to get arrested or someone I know just got raided?

Many! I am actually considering writing a book about all of them. We were blackmailed, a few of my buyers got busted, and in a state of utter paranoia my ex partner had me cut down an entire crop. I remember that day thinking to myself this is it. I am done. I had a stash of cash and quickly made plans to leave SF. I had enough and was ready for my NY experience. 

"In a state of utter paranoia my ex partner had me cut down an entire crop."

Tweet this. 

When people asked you 'what do you do,' how did you respond?

Creative Services! Once we had the garden going I started freelancing as a florist. I really immersed myself and learned everything I could about plants, flowers, and business. I got a few steady freelance gigs that helped me stay connected to the outside world. 

There aren’t many women in the weed biz, especially a decade ago, what was that like?

Oh, I love this question. I realized early on that being a women in my position was a huge asset. It was unexpected, surprising, and refreshing. It showed in my sales and gave me an edge. At times it was intimidating when negotiating price per lb. with five guys in a warehouse, a guard and cameras everywhere, but ultimately my product was superb and boutique. Having multiple businesses since then I actually prefer being a minority. 

What do you think decriminalizing weed would look like nationwide? is this something that’s important to you?

Absolutely. We have got to pull out all those young men and women who are serving time for non -violent offenses, possession, or who have been targeted because of their socio-economic situation. Our laws surrounding marijuana are archaic, unjust, and need to be amended. 

"Our laws surrounding marijuana are archaic, unjust, and need to be amended." 

Tweet this. 

More from our blog:

We Need to Talk: Drawing the Line Between 'Casual Office Environment' and Harassment

I was 15 riding in my dad’s red Mercedes sedan. A car I would later inherit and subsequently total because LA drivers don’t know how to handle the rain. It’s a tragically true stereotype.

Less stereotypical was the conversation that occurred that night between D ole D and me-- the first and only “sex” talk I would get from my father, who probably wished that there was a roadmap as trusty as the Thomas Guide in our backseat, for this convo. Not so. Instead of warning me against the wily advances of Thomases or Tylers, my dad meandered around the topic, finally landing on this odd nugget: “I want you to know that women can be predators too.” I was a sophomore at an all-girls school so the advice wasn’t entirely misplaced, but it was still “so random, so weird.” Which is what I groaned before I stared out the window, unable to make eye-contact. Predator. Not a small word. Pretty aggressive now that I think of it. In a way, looking back at it, this was gender equality at kinda sorta work--my dad thinking that women were equally as capable as men of sexual harassment (though statistically, at least in the workplace, this is not true.)

More than 15 years later that conversation is only now starting to make sense.

In 2016, of the 6,758 sexual harassment charges filed with the EOC, only 16.6% of those were by males. The data do not differentiate between sexual harassment suits between men and women or those of a same sex nature (i.e. a female superior harassing a female employee). Other studies have found that 1 in 3 women between the ages 18-34 report being sexually harassed at work, but over 70% of those women do not report it.  

Consider the number of female-to-female or male-to-male cases even more under-reported.

###

There have been many high-profile cases of male CEOs harassing female workers. Though American Apparel had its unitard ass dragged through the mud thanks to ousted CEO Dov Charney, a former female employee we spoke with said many of the women in executive positions weren’t much better. “When I was at American Apparel,” shared the 30-year-old who works for a new company, “a lot of the leadership was female and all the worst stereotypes about women were evident-cattiness, competitive, emotional-it was so sad to see.”

Derogatory comments about other women’s looks and bodies were common, as was slut-shaming was. “So much shit-talking,” the former AA employee shared. “Non-stop.”

Another source who works in interior design and asked to remain anonymous had this to say: “I personally feel like female superiors do sexually harass juniors, in my profession at least. Just not in the same way as the men. The men are condescending, belittling, and overtly sexual. They hold ‘meetings’ at strip clubs. And they make comments about women in general, if not specifically. The women are territorial.”

She continued, “And women make comments that in my mind--and this has happened personally--would constitute sexual harassment of the slut-shaming variety. Which is a different way of also establishing dominance and superiority. I think women have a really hard time with that. And will until it's a more equal distribution of men and women.”

"Female to female harassment simply reinforces the traditional patriarchal power structure."

Tweet this. 

Which brings up a very important point. As women, we are still navigating what it looks like to have women in charge and, what it looks like to have office environments that are almost entirely female. This has been called the golden age for female entrepreneurship. Women are starting businesses at rapid rates. According to the 2016 State of Women-Owned Business Report it is estimated that there are now 11.3 million women-owned businesses in the United States, employing nearly 9 million people. Female leaders are also navigating a double-edged sword of quelling micro-aggression amongst females and harassment, with the the millennial desire to work in more casual environments. For instance, LinkedIn found that 67% of millennials are likely to share personal details including salary, relationships and family issues with co-workers. One-third of millennials think socializing with coworkers will help them move up the ladder. And 28% millennials have texted a manager out of work hours for a non-work related issue. Granted, those texts don’t have to be of a sexual or inappropriate nature, but many of us are confused about what’s OK and what’s not.

And there isn’t much of a precedent set.

Legally, according to Eisenberg & Baum, LLP there's this:

“The first United States Supreme Court decision acknowledging sexual harassment as a legal cause of action under Title VII came in 1986 with the case of Meritor Savings Bank v. Vinson. That case presented what would now be seen as a classic example of sexual harassment in which a female employee was coerced into participating in sexual acts by her male boss. Over ten years after the Supreme Court’s decision in Meritor, the Supreme Court considered the question of whether Title VII could apply when the harasser and victim are the same gender. In that case, Oncale v. Sundowner Offshore Services, Inc., a male worker on an offshore oil platform complained about the harassing conduct of several male co-workers who allegedly engaged in both verbal and physical sexual conduct with him. The Court noted that Title VII protects both men and women from discrimination based on their sex, and held that sexual harassment by someone of the same gender can be just as illegal as harassment by a member of the opposite sex.”

Just as illegal, but much murkier. Even though it shouldn’t be. Harassment is harassment is harassment. But in these female-first-we-all-champion-each-other times, where do we draw the line between ‘casual and fun’ and harassment?

I’ve worked for horrible male bosses where harassment has been horribly apparent. Those who have thrown trash at my head and told me to pick it up. One who told me he wanted to photo recreate Jesus’ crucifixion with me as the female Jesus. “You kind of look like him,” he told me. Whatever that meant. CLEARLY NOT OK. Bosses who used the word cunt to refer to female clients as casually as a conjunction. When I was pregnant, an employer told me to get married or get rid of the baby because, “I shouldn’t bring a bastard child into this world.” NEVER OK. When it comes to bad female bosses, the behavior hasn’t been as egregious. No female boss ever asked to tie me naked to a cross, that’s for sure. To be honest, I’ve had female bosses I definitely didn’t like, but I am way more hesitant to claim harassment. But in the past week numerous stories have come out about former Thinx CEO Miki Agrawal (a woman C&C has interviewed and supported) and more questions are being asked about what really is appropriate at the office.

Part of the problem lies in our overshare culture. Unlike economics, its effects have trickled into the workplace. The workplace is considerably more open, but sexual harassment laws are considerably more rigorous than they were pre-Anita Hill. It has been an uphill battle. In the 1920s women who couldn’t take the inevitable harassment were advised to quit their jobs. The term sexual harassment wasn’t even coined until 1975 when a group of women at Cornell University called it into being. In the early ‘90s, the American public was still in the midst of figuring out what was and was not acceptable. Finally, in 1998 (and the above mentioned case) the Supreme Court ruled that same-sex harassment was also illegal.

We accept this as truth and yet, when it comes to the current office culture (especially for women), we’re still in funky water. Like we know it’s good for us, but still smells weird. Like Bikram. We openly talk about our periods and sex lives. When we swiped right and where they subsequently swiped. We discuss it on our platforms. We champion truth-telling. We applaud bosses who are forthcoming and girls’ girls and encourage open environments. Until we don’t.

These cases are more rare, but they do happen. In January 2013, a sexual harassment lawsuit involving two women was filed by an Armani employee accusing her boss of unwanted sexual advances. In 2014, one of the biggest cases of same sex harassment involving a female Yahoo executive drew national attention. Maria Zhang, a senior engineering director for Yahoo Mobile, was accused by her subordinate Nan Shi, of allegedly pressuring Shi into having oral and cyber-sex in exchange for a “bright future” at Yahoo. There was a 2014 case against a Wells Fargo superior. 

Now, there are some very clear lines in the sand. Touching, for one. Inappropriate comments as well. But there are countless examples of what a female boss might say to a female employee that would be considered harassment if said by a male, but we are generally more lenient with female bosses. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. I work at a company of all women and I feel free to speak my mind, almost all of the time. I feel safe. There's the 'every company is different' argument, but that feels like a cop-out and also, hypocritical.  

As disturbing as that is, that’s not the biggest problem. The biggest problem is that every time women abuse their position of power, we undermine the equality we’ve set out to gain. Female to female harassment simply reinforces the traditional patriarchal power structure.

Which, brings me back to my dad, oddly enough. Women can be predators, too. It’s not fun to think about, but that doesn’t make it less true. It may be statistically less likely. It may not happen to 1 in 3, but it’s still happening. And it’s on other women to call it out.

That’s how we support each other. That’s how we get stronger.

Arianna Schioldager is Create & Cultivate's editorial director. 

Have thoughts? Please share in the comments below. We're listening.

MORE FROM OUR BLOG 

We Need to Talk: What It Feels Like to Go Back to Work at 40

We Need to Talk is a bi-monthly, anonymous series, where contributors share stories about business, life, and the stuff we don't talk about.

photo credit: Andrea Posadas 

The decision not to go back to work after having kids is a perilous one for most women. 

There area so many factors to consider. Do you go back to work after six weeks so you don’t lose traction at your job? Do you stay home with your newborn and really soak in the first year of your child’s life? Do you wait longer? The scenarios are endless and there is no playbook; it is a personal choice for each and every working mother. 

And there's no right way to do it. That’s the most important bit to remember. What is right for one woman is not necessarily right for you. What works for your twin sister may not work for you. In fact, it probably won't. 

I decided to stay home. I gave up a career in a newsroom. I hit pause on my career dreams and aspirations because I thought those dreams had shifted— and they did shift, for about ten years. For ten years I focussed on morning routines, nap time, bath time, bed time, and every other moment in between. I considered myself a working mom, but I was working for my children, not a company. For ten years my kids became my career. 

"What is right for one woman is not necessarily right for you."

Tweet this. 

And then something happened— I grew increasingly less satisfied. (We're not conditioned to say that or this next bit.) Reading to my kids at night began to feel tedious. I wanted out of this routine and into another— the daily grind of email and brainstorming and late night deadlines that had nothing to do with making sure lunch was packed, that was appealing to me. I wanted a challenge. I wanted my career back. But my career didn’t want me. It had moved on to better and younger things, the women who had worked straight through their thirties and even those in their twenties who were climbing the rungs faster than my legs move at this stage in my life. 

I knew I wanted to return to work, but, like many women who take time off after baby, I had no idea where to start. I felt defeated before I began and I faced the all to common obstacle of a ten year gap in my resume. The entire landscape of my career had changed. Instagram wasn’t a thing when I left work and what on earth did Snapchat have to do with the news? A lot apparently. So does Twitter. It's not like riding a bicycle. It felt like everything had changed in the last decade. 

As I started to do more research I read about The Enternship, a program developed to help women over 40 reenter the workforce. Launched this summer, it is a four-week program aimed to aid women in the 40s, 50s, and 60s learn crucial, modern workplace skills. They chose 8 women, one of whom was a former CNN producer. Others included a stay-at-home mom and a lawyer. I felt relieved to learn that the program received over 600 applications. That meant that there were at least 600 women in the same boat— women not sure which wave was the right one, but they weren’t afraid to start over. And for many women 40 plus starting over after kids is the only option, but that doesn't make it a bad option. I still had the know-how and common sense and practical skill learned during the early parts of a career. I now needed to learn new skills with the humility and hunger of a green employee. In some ways, this was the youngest move I'd ever make. Maybe, starting over would keep me young. 

"For many women 40 plus starting over after kids is the only option, but that doesn't make it a bad option."

Tweet this. 

I knew I had a choice to make: approach this next phase of my life with the humility and work ethic that I had in my early twenties, or fight an uphill battle, one I was sure to lose. One where I let my ego and age take center stage. Or one where I accepted that this was the path I chose, willingly, ten years ago. Did I want to have to choose? Not really. But did I? Yes. And now I wanted to go back to work and that, in and of itself, was going to be work. 

It’s not easy to be older than your superiors, nor is it easy to feel like you’ve reversed even as your age has progressed. But instead of using motherhood as the excuse, I used it to my advantage. I knew nothing about being a mom or how to care for an infant during those early years. I had to be humble and ask for help. I had to look to those who had gone before. Sometimes they were older, and sometimes they were younger. 

If I could take this same lesson and apply it to my career, surely, I would be OK. Surely, step by step, I could climb once more because over the course of your life, you're allowed to live more than one. 

MORE FROM OUR BLOG

We Need to Talk: The Realities of Working While Sick

I don’t talk about this often, because as it is with many disabled or sick people, it’s not what you want to be defined by. Your disability is you and, it’s also not. You feel less than, but you also don’t. And in many ways you feel more capable of taking on challenges because every day presents a new challenge that you overcome. My “disability” is something most people can’t see and I am resistant and to even call it such because compared to those Americans who truly cannot work, I am lucky. 

I have full mental capabilities, both arms, legs, the use of all of my senses, and am in many respects a very healthy person, who simply happens to be very sick. My body is a walking contradiction. I do, however, have an auto-immune disease that I will have for the rest of my life. And as a Type 1 brittle diabetic, there are infinite complications that anyone looking at me is unable to see. 

I am, I should point out, still capable of gainful employment. The Social Security Administration considers “gainful” $1,040 a month for a disabled individual and $1,740 a month for a blind individual. According a report from the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics released June 21, 2016, in 2015 17.5 percent of persons with a disability were employed. 32 percent of workers with a disability were employed part time (compared to 18 percent of those without a disability.) Persons with a disability are less likely to work in management, professional, and related occupations than those without a disability. 

I know I am lucky to be employed full-time in professional position. 

However, it is a complication that roars during moments when I need it to be silent. It’s a disease that has landed me in the ICU three times over the last year. And it’s something that, at times, makes working feel impossible and makes me feel like a failure. 

Your disease doesn't care how hard you hustle. It doesn't care if you have a deadline or a flight to catch. 

"Your disease doesn't care how hard you hustle. It doesn't care if you have a deadline or a flight to catch." 

Tweet this. 

Case in point: I was packed, ready, and supposed to be in Texas for work on a Monday earlier this year. My flight left at 8am. At 5am that morning, I was rushed to the ER and admitted to the ICU for four days. Unable to talk, my mom had to call my boss and let her know I wouldn’t be on the flight. I remember even in that moment, screaming in pain and gasping for air, thinking, I can’t miss my flight. I have to be in Texas. I have to get there somehow. I had only been at my job about a month and I was devastated. I was frustrated. There is the logical part of a person who knows they are useless if dead. There is the other side of me that hates feeling useless when alive even more. 

All I wanted was to get to work. I had no option but wait. And the reality of working while sick is that sometimes waiting is all you can do. 

But that doesn’t mean it’s easy. And it certainly doesn’t mean that I don’t cry or get frustrated or fear that one day, it might cost me my job. 

There are days when my blood sugar is so high that I find it impossible to get work done. Days when my blood sugar is low that I sit at my desk and shake and sweat for twenty minutes. Sometimes this happens in the middle of an important conference call. Sometimes it happens when I’m up against a deadline. 

There are always going to be parts of my job that don’t align with a health plan. Stress raises your blood sugar. Not eating consistent meals makes it go crazy. And as much as I try to manage stress or stay consistent, there are days where I’m up against the clock, or have a million and one things to do, and I’m stressed. My blood sugar spikes. I’ll feel confused, less capable, and disoriented. 

There are moments when you’re afraid you’ll lose your job because of the number of doctor’s appointments you have, or the unexpected trips to the ER that take you out for four whole days. You feel guilty that you get more allowances than your co-workers. You try to make up for it by making sure you don't miss deadlines, that you power through the pain, and show up for your team. But you cannot forget to show up for yourself. 

What I’ve learned is that taking care of my health is number one. I’ve also learned that no matter how regimented I keep it, there are going to be off days. It is during those moments that being patient with myself is more important that soldering through. 

As an employee the best thing I can do is my best. On most days that is more than enough. On my worst day, it might not be. But I've come to learn that I don't need to justify my job. 

I've earned it based on merit and hard work-- something no sickness or disability can take away. 

More from our blog: