6 Women Share Their Career Struggles
The only way out is through.
photo credit: Brooke Lark
So you can’t ride a horse and drink a cup of coffee at the same time. Neither can we. When it comes to life and career we hold ourselves to tippy-toe top standards. We want to be able to do it all and at the same time too. Newsflash: it’s impossible.
Even the greatest and brightest among us have faced challenges. Like one of our favorite authors and writers Kelly Oxford who once told us she feels like she can’t forge ahead, “every time I have PMS.” The struggle is real, but you’re not alone. Which is why it's all the more important to share these stories, reinforcing the reality that everyone goes through it.
Read through how 6 amazing women mitigate the hard points in their respective careers.
Lauren Conrad on how her relationship to her career has changed:
“I've been able to find more balance in my career over the last few years. There was definitely a point in my life when I took on too much and was burning the candle at both ends. Since then I've learned the value in saying no and learned to delegate. It can be hard to trust others to work on a brand that you spent so much time on, but you can't do it all.”
“I’ve learned the value in saying no and to delegate.”
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Sarah Michelle Gellar on taking a major risk:
“As my career has shifted drastically that has certainly taken some adjustment. At my age it would have been so easy to just stay and continue an already successful career, but instead I took the leap and try something I had never done before. Its been exciting, scary, rewarding and quite the adventure.”
Rachel Bloom on a point in her life where she thought, ‘I can’t do this anymore.’
“I've never fully turned away from the arts, but there were points in college that my self esteem was so low I didn't know if I could make it in this business.”
Kristen Ess on challenges she’s faced:
“The hair industry can be very competitive and sometimes nasty. Other hairdressers/colorists will talk about you as if they know you or circulate gossip and it's a bummer. There were many times when I would hear about something ‘about me’ that was so inaccurate or just plain untrue and I had to learn really early to block that out and know that people who participate in that are just not for me.”
Cleo Wade on a point in her life when she thought, ‘I can’t do this anymore.’
“I think we all have mini moments of that feeling throughout our day. Our brain is constantly second guessing our decisions. I think you know you are doing something great if you have moments of feeling overwhelmed.
“You know you are doing something great if you have moments of feeling overwhelmed.”
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Lauren Paul on the realities of fundraising and non-profits:
“Starting and running a non-pro:t is incredible but when you sign up for this you have to know that it becomes a 24 hour job. It was important for Molly and I to look at the hours we were pouring into Kind Campaign and find a healthy balance between that and our family, friends and personal lives. It was also important to figure out how we could take some of the jobs we were carrying and bring people on board to help lighten the load.
All my sisters out there who work in the non pro:t space know how hard fundraising is. There were many points in the first couple years where we were really struggling to get by financially. We would hold grassroots fundraisers with the occasional sponsor. We made a lot of personal sacrifices as a result. Everything changed a couple years ago when we had a huge fundraiser that raised enough money to make all of our programming free of charge for schools. We are proud to say that all assemblies have been free since 2013!”
Have something you’re struggling with? Share with us in the comments below. It's self-caring.
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Content Creator: Cleo Wade
The people's poetess.
This article is part of our Create & Cultivate 100 List created in collaboration with KEDS, you can view the full Content Creator List Here.
Power to the people's poetess.
Cleo Wade has a presence about her that cuts through the digital divide, a kind of solar-powered positivity halo that recharges our batteries when we need it most. It’s rare to be a poet in 2017, but the 28-year-old made the decision to “lead my life with vulnerability,”
Poet, artist, and speaker, Cleo was born in New Orleans and moved to New York City after high school where she began interning, taking jobs in fashion, and working for designers.
She says her favorite thing about her childhood, “was attending poetry summer camp.” But though she was “always writing,” she needed “some time to grow up and get brave enough to make things with words.”
They are words that interrupt a regularly scheduled Instagram stream of humblebrags, Sometimes handwritten, sometimes typed, she’ll employs a feminist narrative: “every mother/is a boss/every woman/is the president…/of/the/universe.” Or she’ll challenge her readers with a more simple: “First things first— give a damn.”
Though she models and collaborates with big fashion brands like Barney’s, she says today she spends most her her time, “making things with words. Sometimes as poems. Sometimes as painting. Sometimes as public art installations.” She’s also currently writing her first book, sits on EMILY’s List’s creative council, supports Planned Parenthood, and canvassed neighborhoods in Charlotte, North Carolina during the last presidential election in support for Hillary Clinton. But Cleo is not a list of things or activities. “Sometimes all people need is to be seen and heard,” shares Cleo. “Sometimes I invite my friends over just to listen. Compassionate listening is the greatest and simplest form of peacekeeping.”
“Compassionate listening is the greatest and simplest form of peacekeeping.”
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In a world in which picking up a phone to speak with someone, let alone talking face to face with a stranger, Cleo is an anachronism. She is the woman with a booth at the Hester Street Fair in downtown Manhattan, set up specifically with the intention of conversing, offering “peaceful and loving conversation.” She is the “hello” that pulls you out of an echo chamber.
“My life goal,” says Cleo, “is to just get up everyday and create tools that help others, listen more, and love big.”
More below.
What keeps you going?
The people who have allowed my work to be apart of their day keep me going. it is a privilege and an honor.
Who are the people you consider mentors or influences?
My brother, my best girlfriends and my parents. The people in my life who have shared with me their most intimate stories are my biggest inspirations and influences.
What is the best piece of "real talk" advice you've received?
My brother really taught me how to be radically honest with myself. The best advice he ever gave me was "seriously, it’s not that serious."
What is your favorite life advice?
There is a sign in someone’s yard in my hometown that says "Until Further Notice...celebrate everything" That is honestly the best advice anyone ever gave me and I stumbled on it on the way to the grocery store!
What is a time in your life when you thought, ‘I can’t do this anymore?’
I think we all have mini-moments of that feeling throughout our day. Our brain is constantly second guessing our decisions. I think you know you are doing something great if you have moments of feeling overwhelmed.
“You know you are doing something great if you have moments of feeling overwhelmed.”
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International Women’s Day is coming up. It's a global day celebrating the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women. If you could steer the conversation around International Women’s Day, what would that dialogue be about?
I think there are certain points in time when women feel like they are continuously fighting and they aren't sure if things are getting better because the fights feel like the same fight over and over again. There is a Coretta Scott King line that Kamala Harris sites often in her speeches that says "Struggle is a never ending process. Freedom is never really won, you earn it and win it every generation." If there is anything I would like to discuss, it is the importance of continuously recommitting yourself and rededicating yourself to the betterment of women everywhere in every aspect of life, and because all of the issues intersect we must care about and root for them all. There is no future in the economic advancement in women without a future in social advancement for all women of every race and background. I always tell my friends there is no future of feminism without a future of anti-racism.
“There is no future of feminism without a future of anti-racism.”
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How has your relationship to yourself changed in the last five years?
I get a little braver every day and as my audience grows, I feel a deeper responsibility and dig more deeply to create a conversation about the challenges of today.
What does female empowerment mean to you?
Knowing that you deserve to feel safe and take up space in this world and knowing that if you have the privilege to know that then you have a responsibility to help other women realize that too.