Why Sophia Bush Says She's a Tender-Hearted Softie—Who Takes No Sh*t
Don't even.
SOPHIA BUSH IS A FORCE.
Read on.
Sophia Bush is the woman you want your daughter to grow up to be.
She's also the woman who would tell you to encourage your kid to be their own person. Forge their own path. It's certainly what she's done. The activist and actress jumpstarted her career when she dropped out of the University of Southern California at 21 to join the CW TV show One Tree Hill. On her 30th birthday, she built a school in Guatemala with the Girl Project. She's raised money for those affected by the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, lived on $1.50 a day to raise awareness about global poverty, taken to her platforms to call the GOP "heartless," supported diversity in Hollywood, gay marriage, and women everywhere.
We caught up with the powerhouse to ask, well, everything about her drive, passion, and badass squad (like the very rad, Ruthie Lindsey).
Read on.
You made a name for yourself in Hollywood, but activism has always been in your heart. What do you want to be remembered for?
What we do is not who we are. That’s true for all of us. Our careers, no matter what kind, are simply a piece of our greater life puzzle. So personally, I hope that the people who matter most to me remember me as a passionate person who stood up for others. As a woman who was for other women. As a friend who showed up to the best of her ability. And as a tender-hearted softie who took no shit.
I hope that the people who matter most to me remember me as a tender-hearted softie who took no shit.
You’re heading to Houston pre-Style Summit. Why is it important for you to be there early?
It’s devastating to see the effects of Harvey on Houston. But seeing folks step up and show up to help is deeply inspiring. I’m just hoping to do my part and lend a hand where I can. Beyond donating and sending clothing and other supplies, knowing that I have the opportunity to lend a literal hand means a lot to me. Our government may be lead by petulant children who feel that arguing about whether science is real or not — newsflash: It is. Arguing that it isn’t is as stupid as claiming that gravity doesn’t exist—but we as citizens can sidestep the madness and show up for our neighbors. That’s what makes this country so great. Us, and our commitment to and support of one another.
You’ve said that in your early career you felt treated like a “chess pawn.” Which, so many women experience, inside Hollywood and out. How did you come to understand your power?
Understanding power is an interesting notion, and I believe that it’s closely tied to self-worth. But self-worth is not a fixed destination you arrive at and then poof! You never feel insecure, or threatened, or anxious, again. Sadly. Wouldn’t it be great if it was!? As those notions of power and worth apply to career verticals, there are systems and behavior patterns in place that subjugate and challenge women everywhere. In every business. From micro to macro aggressions, we face consistent and unrelenting adversity. It’s exhausting. And for me, refusing to be treated as a chess pawn or a plaything or an object was a reaction to that adversity, and it's blatantly and undeniably unacceptable. There is only so long that people can and will put up with circumstances that are flat out wrong. Using my voice, and standing up for myself and those around me has made all the difference.
"Self-worth is not a fixed destination you arrive at and then poof! you never feel insecure."
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How have the past few years changed your thoughts on what your next five years look like?
The past few years taught me a lot about what I want, and also about what I will not tolerate. The positive and negative ends of the spectrum of recent experiences have both been great for goal setting. Everything is a lesson. And it all boils down to the truth that I’m ready to take more control of my career and what it looks like. That will affect projects I want to helm — as an actor, a producer, a director — and the way people working on those projects feel when they come to work. And that’s what I’m looking forward to most. Creating environments that feel safe, freeing, creative, and open. That’s perhaps the greatest way I’ve come to understand my power thus far. And I’m so looking forward to what’s next.
"Champion other women. And you’ll draw in women who do the same for you."
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You’re surrounded by such a stellar squad. Can you chat a bit about the moment when you knew female friendships would power you through?
I cannot remember a time when that truth wasn’t clear and apparent to me. The adage “it takes a village” exists in our cultural lexicon for a reason. We are communal beings. We find greater happiness in a community than in solitary existence. And my community of women is such an exceptional example of that truth. We are a family. We lift each other up. We challenge each other. We support each other in work, family, play, and adventure. I’m in awe of my friends’ brilliance and boldness. Their creativity and their capacity for love. I cannot say enough good things about them. We are a tribe of women that is truly for other women. And if you want friendships like that? Be a woman like that. Be for other women. Collaborate with other women. Champion other women. And you’ll draw in women who do the same for you.
Arianna Schioldager is the former Editor-in-Chief at Create & Cultivate. You can follow her @ariannawrotethis.
MORE FROM OUR BLOG
Everything You Missed from Our Create & Cultivate Style Summit with Simon Malls
We're letting you in BTS.
Mall life is the great life, if you attended the Create & Cultivate Style Summit with Simon Malls at the Houston Galleria last weekend. From @michelletakeaim sharing great social tidbits with the 300+ crowd like, “It's really important to post in real time and build a connection with your followers," to Houston-based fashion illustrator Rongrong Devoe doodling onsite for attendees, to the non-stop note-taking in Erin Condren custom #foundatsimon notebooks. We had a time.
For a better look into the festivities press play on the full recap below. Includes some Sophia Bush mic-drops.
photo credit: Becki Smith/Smith House Photo
video credit: Salt Water & Chaos
MORE FROM OUR BLOG
The Female CEO Who Turned Sophia Bush Down
And the actress' rad response.
Sophia Bush, actress and activist, keynoted our Style Summit at the Simon Mall Houston Galleria this past weekend, and we're still on a high from the knowledge she intentionally slammed, forget dropped-- this wasn't casual, on stage.
If you missed out, we're sharing 6 of our favorite moments to keep you motivated through your work week.
On being a tender-hearted softie who takes no shit.
I’ve had to learn, sometimes, how to scream and swear at the phone and then not send it. You know, write the draft of the response to the person who deserves it, but then channel Michelle Obama, ‘when they go low, I go high,’ and I delete it. But still I am really learning the art of a good clapback and I deserve that. Simply because I exist in public does not make me a receptacle for people’s garbage.
It’s taken me 15 years, but I think I’m sort of an expert.
"I am really learning the art of a good clapback and I deserve that."
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On activism being a huge part of her story and advice to women
You have to find the thing that lights you up and that can be in a good way, or a bad way. What sets you on fire? What makes you so angry? I read a lot about what’s happening in the world today and I’m pissed, I’m so pissed all of the time, and that FIRE that it calls up in the gut of my gut, I’m like, this is why I can’t be quiet. It’s really easy to turn off the news. And look, today is Saturday. My best friend and I laid in bed all morning and ate french fries and drank iced coffee and watched Fixer Upper-- I needed a day. But we have to pay attention and I think the first and foremost step to becoming a more engaged more active member of society, is to pay attention.
On the internet life.
I would encourage everyone here to make the easiest free investment ever. For the next week, please every day, leave a really lovely compliment on at least one of the accounts of women you follow. Please once a day. Because most of the people who take the time to leave comments are assholes. The really nice together people, are scrolling and liking, but we’re busy. So we can really tilt the conversation by leading it with positivity.
On personal style.
When we look at the ways we express ourselves and the ways each of us still might be feeling like maybe today’s version of expression was a risk? Support each other. Whether that’s girls who tend to dress in menswear or girls who love to show off their bodies or girls who are fully covered and wearing a hijab. Love on women. Love on them and tell them they are beautiful. Tell them that their style is sick, even if it’s different from your own. I can’t wait to be eighty and be like Iris Apfel meets Georgia O'Keeffe. I’m gonna be such a silver-haired old lady wearing crazy shit out in the desert collecting bones and painting them.
Her advice to her 20-year-old self.
I was so nervous about letting people down. I didn’t know that when I was 21 and started working in television that I didn’t have to answer every question journalists asked me to be polite. What is polite anyway? Figure out what’s important to you and you don’t have to open up your life in ways you don’t want to. You don’t have to please other people before you please yourself. You don’t have to stay in a job that makes you unhappy. You don’t have to stay in a relationship that makes you unhappy. If you’re pretty sure that guy you’re dating is lying to you, he is. Let it go. I learned that one the hard way.
"You don’t have to please other people before you please yourself."
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I really wish I could look at her and say ‘you already know, stop worrying about what other people know or think or want from you more than you worry about how you feel in the root of the root of yourself.’
On putting yourself out there.
Women are often so reductive about ourselves. Men don’t say I think. Women say I think. You might write an email and say I just think it would be so wonderful to know you. No you know it would be wonderful to get to know that person. That CEO who you idolize or whoever that person is, say: "It would be such an honor for me to spend a morning with you. I have a couple of questions that I know your expertise would be so valuable." Stop saying I think I could benefit, I think I would like to-- no you know what you’d like. You know what you can do. Just go for it. I’ve done that. Last year, I sent an email to an incredible female CEO who I admire so much basically asking the same question. She was so lovely in response and said I’m incredibly strapped for time as it is and what free time I have goes to my kids but thank you so much for writing this email to me, the compliment that you paid me really means the world, and I do hope that in some point when we’re in the same city we both have some free time and we’ll get together. I was like I’m so sad but you’re so classy. It made me feel so good to know that I made her feel good.
Photo credit: Smith House Photo