How I Found the Courage to Quit Stable, Prestigious Careers to Become a Founder at the Age of 29
And my advice if you think you should, too.
“Starting a business is scary. It affects every part of your life. People think you’re crazy, and they’re kind of right.”
-Isharna Walsh, Founder and CEO of Coral
Are you thinking about starting your own business? Do you have a little voice in your head that whispers ideas and dreams about things you want to create? Are you unsure whether you should listen to that voice?
I had that voice, too, and for the longest time didn’t know what to do with it.
As a half South Asian woman, I was raised to get straight A’s, stay out of trouble, go to a prestigious school, and forge a stable career. I followed the rules, getting law and economics degrees, and spending my twenties working in government, management consulting, technology, and venture capital. Then, just before my thirtieth birthday, I quit my job without a safety net to start my company, Coral, which helps people improve their sexual well-being. (Can you imagine what my mother said?).
There’s lots of advice out there about whether or not to take a risk and run headfirst at a business idea, and the truth is that nobody can answer that for you. But looking back now, I can see two things clearly: The time I spent trying on different careers and identities taught me valuable lessons. It wasn’t wasted. Yet it’s also true that these highly demanding, great-on-paper work experiences were my way of stepping right up to the edge of what I really wanted to do before I found the conviction to close my eyes and jump.
Starting a business is scary. It affects every part of your life. People think you’re crazy, and they’re kind of right. It threatens your finances, your mental health, and your career trajectory. You’ll face judgment from your parents, your friends, prospective partners, investors, and strangers who read about you on the internet. And it’s more likely than not that your business will fail.
Stepping into that vulnerable space—and being comfortable there—is especially difficult if you haven’t been conditioned to embrace fear, and don’t have a model that looks like you. As a woman, I hadn’t been groomed in resilience since my first crush rejected me in the schoolyard, like my male classmates. I’d also rarely personally encountered women in positions of leadership, and had never had a female boss. Successful entrepreneurs, in my mind, were either men or celebrities—people who look and act nothing like me.
So what gave me the confidence to go for it? I had to create the space to acknowledge and examine that knowing inside of me, rather than drowning it out with distractions.
For me, this took meditation and introspection. I sat with my self-doubts and learned the subtle distinction between self-preserving fear and self-limiting fear. I let myself acknowledge the knowing that told me entrepreneurship was my path and identified the narratives that held me back as self-limiting and socially constructed, rather than real obstacles. (And in the meantime, I used my jobs as crash courses in high-growth startups, technology development, and the dynamics of venture-funded businesses until I found the business idea I couldn’t ignore).
So when the idea for Coral came, this time the voice in my head was so strong that not doing it felt harder than giving it my all.
If you’re considering whether entrepreneurship is the right path for you, spend time with yourself, in the quiet. Journal, meditate, go for walks, turn inward. Acknowledge the hurdles, personal and societal, and how they might be affecting you. Think through whether you have the self-belief, resilience, and determination to back yourself and push your idea forward through the obstacles—because it’s not easy, and you will want to give up.
When you stop and ask yourself what you want to create with your one short life, chances are that voice will shout.
And you’ll know what you have to do.
About the Author: Isharna Walsh is the founder and CEO of Coral, a sexual wellness app that offers evidence-based guides to better sex for all humans. Born in Sri Lanka and raised in Australia, Isharna worked for the Australian Prime Minister, Boston Consulting Group, and a Los Angeles VC firm before turning 30. After realizing that nothing that is so essential to our health and happiness is as neglected as sex and sexuality, she raised $3 million in seed funding to launch Coral in November of 2019. One year later, Coral is a sexual wellness pioneer that’s helped hundreds of thousands of people create their best sex lives.
MORE ON THE BLOG
So, You’ve Started Your Business—Now What?
A fashion founder breaks it down.
We’ve been spending a lot of time at Create & Cultivate HQ discussing how we can best show up for and support our community during this uncertain time. Community is at our core, and connecting with others through one-of-a-kind experiences is what we love to do. While the world has changed, our mission has not. We’re committed to helping women create and cultivate the career of their dreams, which is why we’re proud to announce our new Ask an Expert series. We’re hosting discussions with experts, mentors, and influencers daily on Instagram Live to cure your craving for community and bring you the expert advice you’ve come to know and love from C&C. Follow Create & Cultivate on Instagram, check out our Ask an Expert highlight reel for the latest schedule, and hit the countdown to get a reminder so you don’t miss out!
Navigating your way through the many challenges, ups, and downs of a small business is a daunting experience but one that many of us are willing to take to pursue our passion and realize a dream. But when you do hit the green light, many of us are left wondering, what now? What next?
Thankfully, Amber Tolliver founder of Liberté revealed some of the basics in her recent IG Live for the Create & Cultivate Ask an Expert series. Ahead, we share some of her tips from the workshop to help you in your process as a small business owner.
Business Basics
Take a Moment
This is the start of a marathon and the hard work is just about to start. However, it’s important to celebrate every win and acknowledge your steps forward.
Make Sure You’re On a Strong Foundation
First things first—a lot of the time we focus all our energy on the product or service side of the business but the business side of business is your foundation and needs to be strong if you are going to succeed.
How has COVID shifted your market landscape?
Are there changes that need to be made to better serve your business goals?
Is your business established in a way to support those goals?
Get Organized and Protect Your Business
Be proactive about what you’ll need in the future. Do you have the necessary legal docs for business operations?
Fun Fact:
A lot of founders don’t know this but law firms will advance you billable hours to help you properly establish your business and provide you with standard legal docs you’ll need to properly run your business.
Make sure you are protecting your assets.
Is your intellectual property protected?
If you’re using consultants or speaking with anyone regarding confidential information, make sure you have them sign a consulting agreement or an NDA.
Learn to Delegate
As brand founders, our business is our baby which makes it hard to hand over tasks and entrust others with work. With that being said though it’s imperative for you to do so.
I can do my books but that doesn’t mean I should.
Hire experts in those areas that are the most important
Navigating the Day-to-Day
Do Not Beat Yourself Up
Mistakes are bound to happen in start-ups, it’s a part of the growing process. Do not beat yourself up over it or dwell on the mistake. Acknowledge it, learn from it, and move on.
Personally speaking, I have experienced this first hand. When I first started on my entrepreneurial journey I wanted to be perfect and precise but when I wasn’t, I would shift my focus to the mistake I made instead of what the lesson was.
Focus on the lesson and be grateful you can keep learning
Master the Pivot
Now more than ever it’s important to be flexible and agile. We have now an idea of what to expect as we move into the second half of 2020 or what the markets will do in response.
Stay focused on what your goal is while remaining flexible on how you’ll achieve it.
If you allow yourself to remain open to alternative routes you may find yourself in a space you never could have imagined.
Avoid Operating in a Vacuum
It’s quite easy to develop blinders as a founder, especially in early-stage businesses.
Make sure to build a team that will support you in the areas you need help
Develop an advisory board whether it’s an official one or not it’s important to get advice from people who know more than you.
Have a mentor or career coach you can go to for support. Business advice is one thing but support for you and the business leader to working to become is another.
Park Your Ego
Being a founder doesn’t mean you’re an expert in all areas of business. If you think you know everything then you end up closing yourself off to new ways of thinking or doing things
As you grow your team, remember to inspire them through your leadership and collaborative mindset.
Never Stop Being a Student
You know what you know, you know what you don’t know but you don’t know what you don’t know. Be open to learning!
New perspectives will give you more viewpoints on your business which means fewer blind spots. The goal is to get a 360-degree perspective so you can see all sides and achieve success.
About the Author
A former fashion student, lingerie model, and frustrated 32E bra shopper, Amber Tolliver is the founder of Liberté, a luxury lingerie brand made for the modern woman. With an extensive 17-year career as a standard and plus-size model, Amber has worked for numerous lingerie brands and was also the face of Aerie’s “Real” campaign in 2013.
While garnering accolades for being a relatable inspiration to young women, her work as a model ultimately fueled her desire to create a brand that meets the needs of women who were ignored by the traditional American lingerie market. Most important to Amber is shifting the perspective of what is possible in bra manufacturing by providing size-inclusive collections, in comfortable and beautiful styles women deserve.
Raised just outside of Chicago and a former student of Columbia College Chicago and FIT, Amber makes New York City her home. In addition to running Liberté, she is actively involved with Girls Inc. of New York and is a dedicated plant mom.
MORE FROM THE BLOG
