5 Very Important Job Hunt Questions

photo credit: Sara Forrest 

Emily Levine is VP of Career Group Companies, a staffing firm specializing in full-time and temporary placement of administrative staff for today's leading companies. Her sister, Natalie Boren, is Managing Director. Both have an inside track on the wild world of hiring. 

Here they break down five common misconceptions about the job hunt, all designed to help you land the position you're eyeing. 

IS SUMMER THE SEASON FOR HIRING?

When people come in to see us, they typically have no idea of whether it’s a good time to look for a job, or a bad time. We constantly hear, “What’s the market like out there?”

Often times people think that summer is a good time to go and interview because their boss’ are on vacation and their work load has slowed down. Summer is actually a very slow hiring season for our clients. That mens it’s a good time to meet with agencies/recruiters, but keep in mind that companies who are hiring aren’t usually as fast in the process over the summer.  Lots of companies utilize summer interns, so after intern season is over, hiring tends to pick up! Think: a week or two after Labor Day. December can also be a slow time because of the holidays, but it’s an excellent time to find temp work.

IS IT GOOD TO TALK ABOUT GROWTH DURING AN INTERVIEW?

There is a fine line that a candidate interviewing for a role needs to straddle.

Being eager, motivated and focused on growth definitely shows that you have goals and want to succeed. However, if too much emphasis is placed on growth, a hiring manager usually feels like the person won’t be happy for long in the role that they are interviewing for. So it’s important to really emphasize that you are motivated, but also know that in joining a new company you have to earn your stripes and build trust, showcase what you can do, and then grow.

SHOULD WE GET INTO THE NITTY GRITTY? 

I’ve heard it’s okay to talk about salary, hours, and benefits on the first interview. Is this true?

We usually say to let the salary, hours and benefits topic arise naturally, and we think it’s best for the HR manager or hiring manager to bring this topic up on the first round. You don't want them to think you are too pushy, forward or only focused on the money/benefits/hours.

THE HOT BUTTON QUESTION OF THE YEAR 

Is it ok to talk about a work/life balance?

Be very careful how you phrase this. There is a difference between being a clock-watcher and wanting a work/life balance. It’s key to emphasize that you are NOT a clock-watcher. Hours in the office range depending on both position and industry. If you are someone who either prefers not to or simply cannot work overtime due to personal obligations (i.e.: picking your child from daycare), it’s always a good idea to highlight your commitment to your work even though you cannot work much overtime in the office itself. Today exempt employees are fortunate to have the ability to work from their mobile phones or log on their personal computers to work in the evening, as more and more companies are granted exempt employees after hours access. Just remember -  always highlight your work ethic as being strong and always be a team player. Prospective employers want to know you are committed to getting the job done before you go home.

HOW DO YOU BEST UTILIZE A RECRUITER? 

Is it best practice to reach out to a hiring manager directly when you are represented by an agency?

It’s extremely important to always go directly to your recruiter with any questions or concerns regarding your job search. Your recruiter has a relationship with the client and is more aware of anything going on in the background regarding your status with that particular client. Furthermore, in order for your recruiter to represent you with the most positive outcome in landing you your dream job, they need to be aware of everything going on.

To be considered by Career Group send your resume to their website directly! You can apply to jobs on: www.careergroupinc.com, www.fourthfloorfashion.com, orwww.syndicatebleu.com, and your resume will be routed directly to a recruiter. 

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The Best Financial Decisions to Make in Your 20s

Image credit: Becca Tapert

Mortgage-backed securities, sub-prime loans, traunches…. It’s pretty confusing, right? Does it make you feel bored or stupid? Well, it’s supposed to. Wall Street loves to use confusing terms to make you think that only they can do what they do. – “The Big Short”

Savings. Does the word send shivers down your spine?

As a Millennial, the (credit) cards may feel hopelessly stacked against you. Everyone said “go to college and a good job will easily follow.” No one prepared you for entering the workforce in the wake of The Great Recession. No one warned you about how long student loans would follow you. No one explained how truly tight life is on a entry-level salary. Living paycheck-to-paycheck often seems like the only way to keep your head above water. However, if you can master the art of saving at a young age, not only are you setting yourself up for a secure future, but you’re also building a powerful muscle of financial self-control.

Disclaimer: I am not a financial professional, just a young person who has worked to gain basic financial literacy.

Build an Emergency Fund

To move away from the paycheck-to-paycheck panic, focus on building an emergency fund. Truly audit your life, exploring what short-term sacrifices you can make. Brew your own coffee instead of buying a fancy latte. Funnel your entire tax refund directly into savings. Sell personal items you no longer use. Surely there’s something you can sacrifice, even $10 a week is better than nothing. You never know when you’ll have a medical emergency or car failure or suddenly become unemployed. However, the one constant with emergencies is they will happen to everyone.

Recommendations vary for emergency fund goals, but most advisers recommend saving 3-7 months’ worth of living expenses. Start small, focusing on just saving $1000. After your first $1000, shift gears to save the next $1000. Breaking this into small goals will make this feel more manageable.

Credit Cards

Don’t. Just don’t. There’s so much to be said on the topic of credit cards: How high interest rates will be your demise. That you should always pay them off in full. You don’t need more than one. You should avoid any with annual fees.

Credit spending will undermine your saving goals. If you’re drowning in credit card debt, then focus on paying off the highest interest rate debts first. Cut up the cards and throw them away. Paying off your 17% interest rate card is a 17% guaranteed return on investment for those dollars, way better than the return on a boozy brunch.

Start Saving for Retirement

Financial professionals everywhere advocate the value of starting a retirement account in your 20s. Touting the power of compounding interest, you’ll vastly multiply your investment if you start saving at 25 versus at 35. Once your emergency fund is healthy enough to protect you from catastrophe, start saving for retirement.

401(k)s – Employers regularly provide 401(k)s and often offer matching programs. Matched funds are basically free money, so sacrifice as much as you can from your paycheck to take full advantage of these. Not doing so means leaving cold hard cash on the table.

Personal Retirement Accounts – If your workplace doesn’t offer 401(k)s, consider opening a personal retirement account. There are many options: IRA, Roth IRA, HSA’s, etc. Talk to a personal investor about your best option, but make sure your investor is a “fiduciary,” which means they’re legally obligated to act in your best interest.

"No one explained how truly tight life is on a entry-level salary."

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Start Saving for Goals

After establishing an emergency fund and retirement savings, you can now save for life’s big purchases. Maybe you want to buy a car, go on vacation, or plan for your wedding. When your friends post magical pictures of what’s going well in their life, it’s easy to get caught in the Instagram jealousy game. Don’t forget, they had to pay for that photo, and many them are doing so with credit cards. No amount of Instagram likes will feel better than paying for a major purchase in-full and with cash.

Be Smart with Extra Income

If you get a raise, bonus or any other unexpected extra income, divert that directly into savings. You’ve already figured out how to live at your current salary. You won’t even notice the difference, but your savings will thank you for the bump.

Fall in Love with Finance

Recently over dinner with my best friend, she mentioned how she’s become fascinated with finance and loves talking about retirement plans with her co-worker. I enthusiastically revealed that it’s also become so exciting to me. We’re total finance nerds.

"No amount of Instagram likes will feel better than paying for a major purchase in-full and with cash."

Tweet this.

There’s a whole world of helpful resources out there to self-educate yourself on personal finance.

If financial personalities interest you and you want to know, “can I afford it?” Suze Orman is a hoot. Dave Ramsay also educates with charisma, breaking financial freedom down into digestible baby-steps.

Maximize your daily commute by listening to economic podcasts. Planet Money and Freakanomics make big economic theories personal by connecting humanized stories to tales of dollars and cents. The Minimalists focus on living within your means and pepper amazing financial wisdom throughout.

If you prefer films, The Big Short is fascinating. Last Week Tonight often covers finance while also cracking you up, like this segment on Retirement Accounts. If you prefer documentaries, check out Frontline: The Retirement Gamble.

Surround yourself with the vocabulary of economic theory and personal savings and before long you’ll become fluent in finance. You might just fall in love with savings.

Do finances overwhelm or excite you?

An original version of this article appeared on Darling. Written by: Talitha Baker.  

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7 Ways to Deal with Demanding Higher Ups

Image credit: Almost Makes Perfect

When it comes to childhood memories, we reminisce fondly on endless summer days, Saturday morning cartoons and a general lack of responsibility. But recollecting other memories, like an acne-ridden face, chunky braces and the bully who tipped over your books in the hallway, feels far less warm and fuzzy.

Although your complexion has since cleared and teeth have straightened, sadly, bullies are just as prevalent today as adults as they were 15 years ago. Just trade the cafeteria for the water cooler and hand-written notes for passive-aggressive emails, and not much has changed.

According to research from the Workplace Bullying Institute, nearly 27 percent of Americans have experienced or are currently experiencing some kind of bullying in the workplace. While there are varying levels of severity depending on the aggressor and his or her actions, when that bully is your boss, the stakes – and your emotional response – are heightened.

Maybe your direct supervisor has inundated you with difficult work out-of-the-blue, and has no concern that you’re leaving the office once the lights turn out. Or maybe, you’re miffed from being continually passed over for new, challenging work and promotions.

Regardless of the wrongdoing, there’s one thing for certain: you absolutely, positively must do something about it.

That doesn’t necessarily mean stomping into your supervisor’s office this second and offering her a piece of your mind. But it doesn’t mean slumping in your desk and simmering, either. You’ll need to approach your higher-up with a calm, collected demeanor and tactical game plan if you want to ensure a harmonious work environment and, most importantly, the growth of your career. Here are the seven most important steps to take before approaching a bully boss.

1. Are you in danger?

While bullying (in any shape or form) is unacceptable, if you feel as though you are in danger or becoming hurt, tell a trusted friend, family member of confidante and leave the situation now.

2. Decide early on what you want to accomplish.

Not all resolutions end in fireworks. If you feel as though nothing good will come of approaching your boss, it’s 100% okay to consider leaving your position. Workplaces are oftentimes riddled with difficult politics and hierarchies, which can make a bullying predicament difficult to overcome. While you search for a new job, try to remove yourself the situation as best as you can and lean on other coworkers/confidantes for support.

"Not all resolutions end in fireworks."

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Of course, if you believe that directly confronting your boss will bear the best results, there’s actually evidence to support your action. According to research from EHS Today, individuals who approached a hostile boss reported higher levels of personal satisfaction at work, removed from feeling like a ‘victim.’ Regardless of your method for coping, ensure you know exactly what you want before diving in headfirst.

3. Start writing everything – meaning everything – down.

In the event you decide to approach your bullying boss, take precaution and start writing every interaction or instance of bullying down. And we mean everything.

Whether it was a demeaning, condescending email or eighth consecutive night you left office after nine o’clock (while he left at five), make sure to log every action, no matter how seemingly insignificant. No matter if it’s used to draft your speech once you approach your boss or to show your boss’s boss, build your case as meticulously as possible.

4. Before outlining your next move, take a moment to step into her shoes.

Whether it was Miranda Presley in The Devil Wears Prada or Dolly Parton’s superior in 9 to 5, totalitarian, ruthless bosses are a popular narrative in our culture. And while your gripes with your boss are certainly warranted, there might be an entirely different story you’re not aware of.

Is your boss shoving piles of work on your desk because she is swimming in work as well, or is he still reeling from his divorce? You’ll still need to express your feelings to your supervisor, but try to remember, he or she is a person too. Refrain from pointing fingers until you know all the facts.

5. Arrange a meeting (but prepare a game plan in advance).

Once you’ve assembled your ammo (AKA factual evidence) and mustered up your courage, you’ll need to finally do the dreaded deed: schedule a time with your boss to talk.

Try to pick a time when he or she will be the least overwhelmed, like in the morning earlier in the week. By Thursday or Friday, your boss might be less inclined to listen to your feelings, especially when they are seemingly negative. Before you enter the room, know exactly what you will say – and what you want to come out of it. Do you want a promotion or a decreased workload? Ensure there’s an end goal, and your boss is made aware of it early on.

6. Think positive.

Although tempting to blurt out to your bully, statements like “I feel like you’re continually turning me down for raises” will get you nowhere. Instead, try to take the emotion out of your complaint and spin it in a positive light.

For example, try: “I’ve noticed that you have turned me down for three consecutive raises. Can you please explain to me why, and what aspects of my performance I can improve for the review period?”

7. Continue to work hard, but know when enough is enough.

Once you’ve left the confrontation with your bully boss, things will undoubtedly be awkward for a bit. And of course, there will be a significant chance he or she will ignore your feelings and continue their bullying behavior.

If this is the case, know when enough is enough. Consider approaching your boss’s supervisor or HR. If that’s out of the question, there’s no shame in finding a new role – with a boss who will appreciate your talents and invest in your success.

This was originally published on Shine, a daily messaging experience to help you live your best life.

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How to Create a Killer Gut Instinct for Business

Image credit: Curated Cool 

As someone who’s traveled her entire life, traversing at different speeds has given me the tools needed to graduate from each lesson along the way.  Whether short trips or long ones, living in various countries for years at a time, or backing the world for nine months straight, travel is impactful. Beyond that, it is tough, life-changing and eye-opening. 

It's also has taught me most of the skills I apply in business today. 

Here are my top six:

BE CULTURALLY SAVVY

We have a global economy. Which means jobs are no longer relegated to one city. Many offices operate in multiple countries, and being able to understand co-workers culture or learn the methodology of how and why someone works the way they do, can give you currency. You’ll have more in common and will be a relatable employee, making your added two cents go that much further.

TAKE RISKS 

I learned this one the hard way: by actually doing it. On a bus trip in Vietnam, I needed to go to the toilet and the bus stopped in a tiny place that wasn’t even on the map. With seconds to decide, I looked at my friend and said, “What do we have to lose? Let's just do it.” It ended up being one of many jump, and the net will appear moments. Companies look for people who aren’t afraid of the unknown, as they seek out the curious. Know that even if you fail, the good ones fail forward.

"Know that even if you fail, the good ones fail forward."

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Without risk, there is no reward.

WORK OUT YOUR GUT INSTINCT 

A favorite muscle of mine that is often overlooked is the inner gut. It needs to be worked out and strengthened, just like anything else. When you're traveling problem solving is part of the itinerary and you become accountable for your actions and make choices on-the-go.

When we aren’t surrounded by people to make choices for us we develop a killer gut instinct that can prove very beneficial to your career. Employers encourage workers to form opinions, make snap but important choices, go with their gut, and many times will put you in a position where you are the final decision-maker. What’s your gut telling you to do?

PROBLEM SOLVE LIKE A PRO

Nothing says time to problem solve like the wrong direction, out of gas, missed a flight, forgot my stop and no English. The above has happened to me in so many ways, and then some! I figured it out, survived, and you will too.

Companies love to see how a worker handles problems that get thrown their way. 

EXPERIENCE GRATITUDE 

Sure, it's nice to think we can make it on our own, but the reality? Yeah, we all need people. I’ve never been in a country where I didn’t need help, sought out advice, or listened to a local. People have been so kind and gracious towards me on journeys, it's only right to pay it forward.

By asking your co-workers or friends in business how you can help them in their life, or perhaps help with a problem that needs solving, you're showcasing your uniqueness, your willingness to help, and the art of contributing in a selfless way. Trust me, it’s a thing.

DEVELOP CONFIDENCE 

You don’t need months of travel to obtain it, but by making tough choices, taking risks, and jumping every hurdle that comes your way (sometimes gracefully, sometimes not) you’ll get there. Spending months in countries where you don’t speak or read the language will help you develop an internal confidence that is irreplaceable. 

Cream rises to the top, and a smart boss will recognize this. Own your confidence and wear it proud.

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Melinda Fleming is the founder of Curated Cool. She been blessed by the Dalai Lama, trekked the Himalayas, and shopped the flea markets of London . She is always seeking what’s unique & chic regardless of the city or town she's in. 

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Here's How to Master the Interview Follow-Up

Above: Diamond Patterned Thank You Notes

“Follow-up” and “follow through” are two very similar concepts that are key to your success in the business world. And you can bank on potential employers paying attention to your post-interview follow-up skills as an indicator of your follow-through when it comes to the job. 

See, landing the interview and then nailing it, that’s just half the battle. You need to follow up with finesse to inch ahead of other candidates. One way to do so is to send a personal thank-you note. The art of the thank you is not lost. We worked with Papyrus, the social expressions company that knows all about a professional thank you, to create the ultimate list of follow-up to-dos.

TIMING IS EVERYTHING 

Before you leave the interview, ask the interviewer about the timeline for making a hiring decision to know when to follow-up. 

The way you follow up with your interviewer will indicate how you will follow up with your potential clients. For instance, sending a quick “Thanks for the meeting today” email is great. Most hiring recruiters say the faster you get this out, the better. It shows that you’re on top of things, you have tenacity and you want to stay top-of-mind. Sending more than one email in a week is a bother. 

IF AT FIRST YOU DON’T SUCCEED, DUST YOURSELF OFF 

And try again. 

If they said they will make a hiring decision within a week, sending one more polite inquiry after that week has passed is more than OK. In fact, it’s smart due diligence. You never know why or when something might have slipped through the cracks. 

"Landing the interview and then nailing it, that’s just half the battle. You need to follow up with finesse."

Tweet this. 

In the second follow-up, mention recent company news, whether it’s a blog post you enjoyed or a news article that included the brand. 

Asking, “Did I get the job?” is not what this follow-up is about. Instead, direct your efforts so that the person hiring thinks, “This candidate should get the job.” People don’t like a teacher’s pet, but they do like someone who pays attention. And if you weren’t on the list of potential hires, this might put you on it. 

BE BOLD, BUT NOT BRASH 

Hiring managers and founders are inundated with emails. Get out of their inbox and into their head with a handwritten note on beautiful stationery. 

It should be a bold and to-the-point thank you follow-up in which you reference a specific point of the conversation that you’d like to expand on. It’s not enough to thank them for their time— you need to tell them WHY you deserved it. There is always a tidbit of information that will show how closely you were paying attention. 

A good outline of what to write is as follows: 

Dear Jackie, 

What a great meeting this afternoon! When you mentioned your company is really focused on growing your social media presence among Gen Z, the ideas started flowing. As someone who has doubled their own social media following over the last year and reports a 4% engagement rate, I feel confident that I can help you achieve that goal. I would love to talk over more ideas and strategies with you. Thanks again for your time and the opportunity to meet. 

Best, 

Arianna

Use all those 140-character skills you developed with Twitter to nail the art of the quick note that will make them want to click through — aka call you back. And what are those “ideas” you mention? That’s for you to share in interview number two. Make sure you drop the note in the mail as soon as you can so that it lands on their desk 2–3 days post-interview. 

THE STATIONERY YOU CHOOSE SAYS SOMETHING ABOUT YOU

When you’re picking the card, consider the audience and your reasoning.  

Is the company a start-up and you suspect the founder would consider a more playful approach? Was the interview in a more corporate environment where something classic would be appreciated?

After considering your audience, consider yourself. Cards can reveal as much about you as the words you write in them. Here is a chance for you to show your interviewer that you understand the culture of the company, but also feel comfortable injecting your personal brand and approach into their world. 

TO SEND OR NOT TO SEND…A GIFT 

For some, this is an overeager act. For others, it shows that you’re really serious about the position because sending a gift after every interview would not be good for your bank account. 

Choose something that’s fun and won’t take up space on their desk. À la compliment pencils. What’s not to love? Send them with a note that says, “Pencil me in as your new hire.” Or super cute bow tie paper clips for that stack of paper you noticed on their desk.

KNOW WHEN IT’S TIME TO MOVE ON

Even if you think you lit that interview on fire, it’s possible another candidate came in and burned the building down. 

There are going to be plenty of jobs you want and don’t get. The most important thing is to keep building professional bridges, which is why you should also always ask if it’s OK to connect with them via LinkedIn before you leave the initial interview. Make the connection, that way even if you don’t get the job, they are still in your network and they can see your updates. 

You never know when that job, or another that’s more suited to your skills, will open up. 

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Should You Take a Job Outside Your Industry?

Is it better to take a job outside your industry, or wait until something better comes along? It’s a precarious situation. If you wait for something to come up, you might be waiting (and struggling financially) for a while, however if you do take a job that’s outside of your desired field or specialty, you may be settling when something else is right on the horizon.

When you’re deciding whether or not to accept a position, it’s important to ask yourself 3 main questions:

Is this the direction you want to take your career?

Is there room for growth?

Do you have the luxury of being picky about what kind of job you take or do you need to find something now (due to finances, employment gaps, etc.)?

Ultimately, if it’s not the direction you want to take your career, it’s not worth it. If you have the opportunity to take a new job, but it’s not the direction you want to take your career, it’s not worth the risk. If you’re exploring an opportunity because it has better pay or better benefits, that is a personal decision where you have to weigh the pros and cons.  But think on this: if you drive 20 miles south when you want to go north, you’re going to have to drive an extra 20 miles back in the direction you want to go. Essentially, once you take your career in an opposite direction, it is that much harder to get back on track.

What will happen if you take a long term job that isn’t what you want? On the surface, it may not seem terrible. Everyone understands that you need to make a living and subsequently do what needs to be done to make that happen. However if you do take a long term job that isn’t in the direction you want to go, you might be creating more hurtles for yourself. 

Think of it this way: If you have been working in business development but want to transition into marketing, the more positions you take in business development, the more likely you are to appear as a business development professional, and less likely to appear as a marketing professional. If you want to transition into marketing, a better way to go about this would be to take classes and volunteer to collaborate on projects with the marketing department at your current company. Then it makes sense when you apply for a marketing role. Even if you have to start at the bottom, taking a role in the right industry or field is an important step. The more you can put on your resume that’s marketing related, the more your marketing skills will be highlighted. 

When you’re looking to transition jobs or roles, it is important to think about the big picture. This is where the “room for growth” question comes in. Are you exploring other opportunities only to find that you have to start at the ground? If you want to take your career in a specific direction, look for roles that point you in the direction of your goals. Focus on positions where there is room for growth, so that even if you have to step down a level in authority, you can take solace in the fact that the end justifies the means. 

"When you’re looking to transition jobs or roles, it is important to think about the big picture."

Tweet this. 

Everyone starts from the bottom at some point, so as long as there is room for you to grow and learn, there is nothing wrong with starting from scratch.

What Should You Do If You Haven’t Found the Right Opportunity, But Need Money Now?

If you are struggling financially and find yourself eager to work, even if it’s not the best position, consider taking a temporary role where you can explore your options and establish new connections. There is nothing wrong with taking a temporary or contract position to fill the transition space, however taking a permanent job is just that-- more permanent.  

In this case, I always suggest that people look into temporary or contract positions. The partnership of "temporary" and "job" has a somewhat negative connotation, but I personally know many people (myself included) where temp positions have opened completely unexpected doors.

Temporary positions serve three main benefits:

They give you income while you’re in transition or in between jobs;

They give you the freedom to look and apply for other jobs while you’re still working without the guilt;

They establish networking connections and opportunities for you.

If you excel at your temporary position, chances are that you will meet people who can a) point you in the right direction, b) know of a job that may interest you, or c) will work with you to keep you at the company but progress to an area that better suits your qualifications.

There is no down side to taking a temporary position in between jobs, because if you don’t like it, you can simply end the position. Similarly, if you do find a better position, there is no need to feel bad about leaving a job or a company. A temporary position is made to be flexible, so companies are generally pretty understanding if you find a full time position that is better suited for you long term.

It can be frustrating when deciding if it’s better to take a job outside your industry or wait until something better comes along, but ultimately, you have to keep your eye on the prize. Focus on finding positions that will propel you in the right direction, even if you have to work your way up, and work hard to highlight your unique skills and abilities.

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A native San Franciscan, Michele Lando is a Certified Professional Resume Writer and founder of writestylesonline.com. She has a passion for helping others present the best version of themselves, both on paper and in person, and works to polish individuals' application package and personal style. Aiming to help create a perfect personal branding package, Write Styles presents tips to enhance your resume, style, and boost your confidence.

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Do You Know Your Financial Health?

Financial health starts with getting real about your goals. A no filter, no Facetune, long-hard look about where you are, where you want to be, and the realities of getting there. So we asked Colleen Wilson, goal setting and finance nerd, and founder and CEO of Collaborate Chicago - a consulting, coaching and advisory company dedicated to helping women build profitable companies and have impactful careers, for her tips and career advice.

Colleen says, “It starts with getting real about goals, setting a good foundation and putting a plan in place to get you there. The end of the year is the perfect time to re-evaluate where you are versus where you want to be, reflect on lessons learned, and think about how to move closer to your goals.  

Ask yourself: what would my future self do?”

Here are her six steps to healthy financial future.

1. UNDERSTAND YOUR FINANCIAL GOALS AND SET THE FOUNDATION NOW

Investing in your future isn’t only about securities; it all starts with goals.  A Harris Poll survey reports that roughly 76% of millennials believe they need a financial plan to achieve their financial milestones, however they are also more likely to worry about never achieving traditional milestones. So what’s your plan?

With so many resources available (many free) on personal finances and financial goals, take the time now to get clear about what your financial goals are. Maybe a house is one of them or that dream wedding. Maybe it's to retire at 50. Maybe working part time when you have kids is on the list. Maybe it’s as simple as having enough in the bank to not worry about emergencies throwing you off your game. Get clear on what those goals are.

Get them on paper and research how much they will cost. Applied knowledge is power...and much of it is free. There are several great goal visualization softwares available that can help you see how much you’ll need and how much you’ll need to save for each based on your age and risk tolerance levels. A good personal financial advisor or financial planner can be instrumental in the process as well.

Small changes create options.

2. CREATE AN EMERGENCY SAVINGS

If you don’t have an emergency piggy bank to break into, you might end up broke. Lots of financial advisors will refer to emergency funds as rainy day funds-- things that you need to prepare for “just in case.” You can't always control when a rainy day hits and you have that emergency expense. But what you can do is have a rainy day fund to make that bump in the road a bit easier to navigate.

"If you don’t have a emergency piggy bank to break into, you might end up broke."

Tweet this. 

In 2015, the national average personal savings rate in the US was 5.7%. That’s not high. Ask yourself: how much of each paycheck am I setting aside for things like parking tickets, the car breaking down, or the dog getting sick? Most millennials largest fear is living paycheck to paycheck. Take control and start saving a bit today.

WHAT YOU CAN DO NOW:

• Put down (again, on paper) what you need for 3-6 months of living. Start there.

• Consider setting up a high-yield savings account with 3-6 months living expenses. Make sure that if something happens you do not need to resort to putting those emergencies on a credit card that you can’t pay off right away.

The more you save, the more you’ll want to save.

3. IT SEEMS A LONG WAY OFF, BUT YOU NEED TO CONSIDER RETIREMENT

While most millennials say they expect to retire, only 22% of millennials say they are currently saving for this common financial goal. When you are young time is on your side, and retirement savings vehicles like IRAs and 401ks offer the advantage of tax-deferred savings. The more you save earlier, the more realistic this goal becomes; you put time on your side.

WHAT YOU CAN DO NOW:

• Contribute to a company-sponsored 401k - especially if your company offers a match.
• Open and fund an IRA - any financial advisor, broker dealer, or financial planner can help you get started.

Our generation will want to retire, but we’re not used to thinking about our future; we’re used to thinking about the here, the now, and it could cost us in the long run.

However, time is on your side when you are earlier in your career and as you get older, your needs may change. Starting sooner rather than later pays off. You know what makes it easier? Knowing WHY you are making small sacrifices here and there (see #1...get those goals!)

4. BUILD BETTER HABITS

You can’t always control how much you make, but you can usually control how much you spend (again, see #2 about rainy day funds). Can’t save what you want? It’s time to look at that spending. Where is your money going each month? And how is that serving your goals?

"You can’t always control how much you make, but you can usually control how much you spend."

Tweet this. 

Shortly after getting my first job after college, I remember working with my dad to build a spreadsheet to see how much I could spend given how much I was making. We calculated necessities like taxes, health insurance, car payment and rent. It was sobering to see that given my salary I could only spend $50 on “entertainment” per month! I could spend that in ONE night out!. Even in 2006, that terrified me. But it also empowered me. What could I move around? Should I be shopping at Pottery Barn or asking my family for hand-me-down furniture? Knowing what my goals were even when I was only making a small salary, helped me prioritize. Even today, after getting married and making more money, I still review my spending each week to see where I am getting off track. It also helped me carve off larger and larger portions of my income for savings versus constantly upgrading my lifestyle with each promotion. Why shouldn't you automatically do this? See number 2 :)

WHAT YOU CAN DO NOW:

• Use a tool like mint.com or your bank transactions/credit card statements to review if your spending is in alignment with your goals. Are there any categories that are getting too big? Too many big dinners with friends? Too many Amazon Prime purchases?
• What about subscription services that you rarely use? Look for opportunities to cut out some of the unnecessary expenses and immediately funnel that money each month (automatically) into an emergency fund or towards one of your financial goals.

You owe it to yourself to know your numbers and know where your money is going.

5. THERE IS NO WEALTH WITHOUT HEALTH

Anyone else concerned about rising healthcare costs? One of the best ways to make this less of a future burden concern is to prioritize your health now. Just like building strong financial habits now, take your health seriously and be proactive.

Proactive = Preventative

Ask yourself some of the below questions and get into action. Often there are many resources at our fingertips, we simply have to look.

WHAT YOU CAN DO NOW:

• Are you using your company or self-funded health benefits to their fullest?
• Do you get a gym membership or health stipend through work that you are not using
• What about access to nutritional coaches or EAP programs?
• Does your employer offer an Health Savings Account or Flexible Spending Account that makes saving for medical expenses even easier?
• Are you getting your well woman exam each year?
• Getting those teeth cleaned? Do you know the cost difference between a cleaning and a root canal?!

Small changes when you're young can make a world of difference in how you think, act, feel and live. While you can’t always calculate the exact cost, bank on the saying “your health is your wealth” being true.

6. LOOK AT YOUR CAREER & ASK YOURSELF, WHAT MORE CAN I DO?  

I’m not talking about taking more classes or going to get a master’s degree. I’m talking about re-examining your salary and compensation. When was the last time you took a look at how your salary compares in the market place? Are you wanting a new role or position that comes with a higher salary?

WHAT YOU CAN DO NOW:

• Identify where you want to be and investigate what it takes to get there. Simple.
• Consider if you need a new skill or leadership experience. You don’t need to invest in a degree, but there are many weekend courses that will teach you new, relevant skills that place you at the head of marketplace. Don’t know InDesign? Take a class. Feel a little shaky on best new social media practices? There are courses.
• Are you qualified now but have not had those conversations with your leader?
• Make it a priority to look for a job where employers 401k match, offer paid leave, or have great health care that can save you money.

Ensuring you are properly compensated is a cornerstone of financial health. These are all decisions you need to look at when you take a job. Make sure you feel good about where you are and if you don’t, know what your options are and have a plan to get there. This is where a great business coach, advisor or mentor can come in handy.

###

Disclaimer: This content in this communication is opinion and for informational purposes only; it is not intended as financial or legal advice. For specific guidance on your financial situation please consult a qualified financial professional.

Colleen Wilson is a speaker, business coach and consulting, and the founder & CEO of Collaborate Chicago - a consulting, coaching and advisory company dedicated to helping women build profitable companies and have impactful careers. Prior to creating Collaborate Chicago, Colleen held several leadership roles at Edward Jones and most recently led product marketing for the Square Capital platform at Square. Collaborate Chicago is a culmination of her professional experience, business school and consulting work, and is the resource she wish she had as she navigated her career and launched her business.

Colleen is a obsessed with women empowerment, whiteboarding, product development, and finding the perfect shade of lipstick. Contact Colleen at hello@collaboratechicago.com

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Millennial Women Are Burning Out Faster Than Ever

Millennial women are burning out. They are also leaving their jobs at a faster rate than their male counterparts. This has nothing to do with babies. So what’s happening?

Here are four common reasons and what we can do about it.

THE REASON: SOCIETAL EXPECTATIONS

Even though women are starting companies and bringing home the bacon more than ever, there is still gender bias that exists in both the workplace and at home. In 2013 the US Census released data showing that 40% of household breadwinners were women. Still, the pressure to perform gender roles at home and smash through them at work is exhausting.

WHAT CAN WE DO: BELIEVE IN THE POWER OF THE FUTURE! 

This is a tough one because this is something that will (fingers-crossed) work out over time. The rate of men staying home to raise the kids is not congruous to the number of women in the workplace. And women have been starting businesses at a faster rate than men for the last twenty years. Research has shown that women will create over half of the 9.72 million new small business jobs expected to be created by 2018.

So, we keep fighting for parity, in all areas of our lives. And we look to the future generations. Specifically, Gen Z, who, research has shown will be the least judgmental of all generations. They are less likely to ascribe to gender norms or put people in boxes.

"We keep fighting for parity, in all areas of our lives. And we look to the future generations."

Tweet this. 

Which means expectations will change-- for both genders-- and ideally, the pressure to be all things to all people will subside.  

THE REASON: UBER-CONNECTED WORKPLACES

Technology, you Medusa. Your snakes have slithered into every moment of our lives and it’s turning us to stone. Or ash, since we’re talking about #burnout.

Our parents never had to deal with this! They’ll never understand the reality of working round-the-clock and having an employer that can contact us at all hours of the day. I once had a boss who, if he wasn’t in the office, Facetimed me almost every morning to make sure I was staying on track. It became exhausting to see his face. Sometimes I was in the bathroom. Other times, I’d miss the call because I was refilling my coffee. If I missed it, I was reamed. And I burnt out 100% and left that job.

WHAT CAN WE DO: SWITCH OFF, WITHIN REASON

Easier said than done. A black screen is our worst nightmare, but we are creating an abyss more ominous than any black screen: our professional burnout before 30. 

"Technology, you Medusa. Your snakes have slithered into every moment of our lives."

Tweet this. 

You need to set boundaries with your job. There is no reason that you need to be answering emails at midnight or checking your phone FIRST thing upon waking. The healthiest mind is a balanced one. How many times do we have to say it before it sticks?

Start somewhere small-- because small changes create bigger boundaries and better habits. Aside from the obvious dangers of texting while driving, make a pact with yourself to NEVER answer a single work email or text while you are driving because it will help set a boundary. It will not only save your life or others’, but driving is a 100% legitimate reason to not answer a frantic text/email from a boss or colleague. Tell your boss you’ll no longer be answering texts or emails from the car. As long as you make it to work on time, this is healthy place to start.

THE REASON: UNCLEAR CAREER PATHS 

We hear about women who are fired and find themselves.

We hear about women who boldly quit and find themselves.

We hear about women who make the transition from “job” to “career.”

Very rarely do we hear about women who stayed the course and found themselves within their current position. Guess what? It happens! This should excite you even though career means something very different than it did 20 years ago. The shifting technological landscape and startup world mean everything is moving at warp speed. It’s hard to know what a tenured career will look like when you can’t see two years from now. It's hard to think about the fact that maybe our generation will never really retire! 

WHAT WE CAN DO: BE THE CARTOGRAPHER OF YOUR OWN CAREER

If you feel lost within your current position, write down the goals of where you want to go. You can take the freelance backroad or you can hop on the corporate interstate but goal-mapping is important and journaling is the enemy of confusion.

This is completely on you. It’s not up to your employer or boss to create your path. If you want to move forward within the company, make it known. Talk to you supervisor about what your options are. Don’t quit because you can’t see the forest through the trees. Wipe the sweat from your brow and refocus.

THE REASON: IT’S NOT YOUR PASSION

It doesn’t help that social media features lots of influencers who have “quit” their day jobs and refused to pursue passion in the margins. Some people say that if it’s not your passion, you will burn out. But other millennial women are using this as an excuse to bounce from their obligations.

WHAT CAN WE DO: FIND THE PASSION IN YOUR CURRENT JOB

The pairing of job and/or career and passion is not a perfect one. If you are looking for complete satisfaction out of a career, boy will you will be looking for a long time! Even the people you meet who love their career, still don’t like them sometimes. It’s like marriage-- some days it’s love, some days it’s work.

Everything worth having is hard work-- that includes passion. No relationship and no job will completely satisfy you; it’s the reason why we have more than one friend. Unfortunately it’s much harder to have more than one job. So work to find the passion in the work you are doing and you might end up finding your true calling. Or falling for the job you already have. 

And then think back to point #2 and map out your career goals. 

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Hey Lauren: How Do I Become My True Self and True Brand?

"Hey, Lauren" is our new bi-monthly column from licensed psychologist Dr. Lauren Hazzouri.  Dr. Hazzouri is a TV show host and founder at Hazzouri Psychology, where she’s carved out a successful niche treating women who are psychologically healthy—but trying hard and not getting satisfaction in various aspects of their lives. Through her life experience and training, Lauren’s developed a program that allows women to live meaningful lives and feel fulfilled doing it. Lauren is founder of HeyLauren.com, a project for women, where she provides evidence-based insights on job stress, relationship woes and everything in between. 

photo credit: Tory Williams

Hey Lauren,

How do we become ourselves and build a brand simultaneously?

Thanks,

The IG Generation  

To do this discussion justice, let’s start with a short ( and necessary!) psych lesson. According to Carl Jung, Swiss psychiatrist and psychotherapist who founded analytic psychology, in order to become whole individuals, we’ve got to strike a balance among our personas, our egos, and our true selves. The persona, a mask we create and wear in public, is an expression of our egos—how we wish to see ourselves and for others to see us. The persona is not a problem, nor is the ego; they’re both necessary! The problem arises when we identify too much with one, allowing our personas to become our identities. When that happens, our true selves have little room for growth. The result is that we feel stuck and discontented, having a hard time integrating and becoming our whole selves. 

BUT HEADS UP! WE BRAND OUR PERSONAS. 

Much like identifying too much with persona, mistaking our brand identity for our true selves puts our personal individuation at risk. In short, individuation is a process of self-discovery and is said to be necessary in our quest for purpose and meaning in life. The answer is NOT to shy away from personal branding. Instead, to stay on track to true self while building a brand, a dose of objectivity is key. Your personal brand is merely a means to connect self and society. So, do your damnedest to keep your brand values in line with who you really are. This way, you’ll be sure to keep the discomfort that comes with cognitive dissonance at bay, and growth in one area won’t compete with growth in the other. 

The process of building a brand and the process of becoming your true self look very different. Think about it—building is defined as constructing something, while becoming is defined as passing into a state. Believe me!—I know. Taking action is much easier for most of us than being passive. At times, the action is in the inaction. It’s easier to practice with the end-goal in mind. Remember—the reason you’re building your brand in the first place is in an effort to make your mark on the world—to meet your life’s purpose. Research on individuation tells us that you’re going to have to get acquainted with your true self first. 

Therefore, creating an environment where your true self can emerge is necessary. 

HERE'S HOW!

START WITH CHARACTER  

On the path to becoming your true self, it’s important that you begin to act more like the wind and less like a weather vane. A ( not-so-easy!) way to do that is to hone your character through a steadfast commitment to: Honesty: Be honest with yourself and others, regardless of the consequences; Accountability: Always do what you say you’re going to do—no excuses!; Responsibility: Respond, don’t react to your environment; Integrity: Do the right thing—even when nobody’s looking! 

SPEAK UP

Say what you mean, mean what you say, don’t say it mean. People pleasing is deceitful. You think you're being so nice. Agreeing when you don't agree, being okay with whatever when you're really not is stealing.

"Say what you mean, mean what you say, don’t say it mean."

Tweet this. 

Social interaction—and that includes social media—benefits us in that it provides opportunities for us to learn about ourselves by comparing and contrasting opinions and viewpoints and allowing others to do the same. You're not only stealing a growth opportunity from you, but also from your followers, too. The path to true self requires courage.

TAKE NOTE OF YOUR HOT SPOTS

Having insecurities is part of the human condition, which is not only fine but expected! Beware of how your experiences and insecurities shape your perception. We have the tendency to morph into what people seem to like or dislike. Losing our way is rarely the result of accurate information coming in. Instead, it’s how we view the information coming in. In order to reach the ultimate destination ( your true self!), it’s important that you dismiss what feels like negative feedback by getting familiar with the irrational thoughts that perpetuate insecurity. Bottom line—look out for triggers! Monitor your thoughts. And remember, respond don’t react. 

EMBRACE THE FULL PACKAGE 

We all have many aspects to our personalities. Recognize and foster each one. A lot of times, it seems that personal branding leads women to pigeon-holing themselves into certain personas. We have a tendency to pick and choose aspects of ourselves that are seemingly more marketable and less likely to increase vulnerability. Your personal brand ( and personal growth!) can only be a success is you recognize and celebrate all that makes you, you. 

JOURNAL IT (WITH PEN AND PAPER) 

Becoming our true selves is a life-long process. There are no short-cuts, and there’s no easier, softer way. Journaling is the enemy of confusion. I recommend you journal for 20 minutes a day. The health benefits of putting pen to paper cannot be overstated. Even better, writing accesses the left hemisphere—the rational part!— of your brain. In an effort to combat outside influences, write down your thoughts. This way, you’ll be sure to take the lead from the part of you that responds with grace, rather than reacts in fear. 

"Journaling is the enemy of confusion."

Tweet this. 

Following these several tips is a part of a foolproof plan to grow personally and professionally simultaneously—a true win-win. Brand that!

###

Dr. Lauren’s on a mission to bring psychology to the public. She contributes to a variety of online publications, provides candid talks to women’s organizations across the country, and was recently cited in Forbes.  

Dr. Lauren is the 2016 recipient of The Psychology in the Media Award from The Pennsylvania Psychological Association and is a member of The American Psychological Association. For more from Lauren, visit @dr_lauren  and sign up for her weekly newsletter at HeyLauren.com.

TO SUBMIT QUESTIONS:

Congrats on Your Failure

written by: Jane Helpern

At first glance, getting fired is...not ideal. In many cases, it's completely unexpected, and can render your ego and bank account severely depleted (a special thanks to last week's #spenderbender for helping slide into that unemployment office in style). There's no denying that being canned is a tough blow. We're talking emotional, professional, and financial damages -- especially in the short term (First rule: don't wallow! Get proactive with our essential job hunting tips here). But, as you'll read today, getting the ax can also be incredibly liberating, and function as the much-needed impetus for progress, growth, and change. Below, hear from four unstoppable women who masterfully manifested getting fired into their best career move yet. Because when life gives you pink slips, make pink lemonades.

Name: Allie Greenberg

Occupation: Brand Marketing Manager for Richer Poorer

HOW IT WENT DOWN: The way I was fired was actually pretty fucked. There had been rumors swirling around for weeks that there were mass layoffs coming down the pipeline. Since my company was so nepotistic, there were a ton of people there who spent more time at the free coffee bar or playing ping pong than actually doing any work - so this didn't seem that shocking to me. The week it happened, they sent out an all staff meeting invite where the big boss basically told everyone some people were about to be fired and how bad he felt about it. In retrospect, it was VERY Hunger Games. Since I worked on one of the busiest teams (generating content for a social audience that was over 10 million people at the time) working 50-60 hour weeks, I assumed my job was really safe. They had actually just brought on an agency to help support us because we were so busy and social media, in general, was exploding. I thought I was fine. Little did I realize they brought on the agency to replace us and the weeks prior when I was walking them through my piece of the puzzle I was actually training them to take my job.

“When life gives you pink slips, make pink lemonades.”

Tweet this. 

HOW YOU FELT: I think there were about 60 people fired that day. Initially, I was really shell-shocked. My job paid quite well, I worked ten minutes from home, and I had become best friends with two of my coworkers. That said -- I hated that job. HATED. I had a boss that created a glass ceiling for me and stood in my way from any true growth or promotion. Plenty of ideas I pitched got killed and anything that didn't, I never felt like I actually got credit for. I loved the mission but didn't feel like what I saw on the other side was true to what we messaged.

THE TURNING POINT: I think while I felt supremely fucked over, I felt the massive relief of not having to get up and go to a job I hated. I also realized I kind of hated social media altogether and that I should take some time to think about what it was I actually wanted to do. I got a bunch of jobs offered right after I got fired but lived off severance, unemployment and rando freelance jobs while I waited for the right opportunity to come along. There were times where I thought it would never come along but yay, it did. Honestly it took awhile but THANK GOD I held out. 

WHERE ARE YOU NOW: Honestly, nearly two years later at my current job I could not be more grateful for what happened. I have the most incredible boss who values me and my strengths and challenges my growth. She cares about making me better at my job and sees that by me being awesome at what I do I make her look more awesome. I truly, truly, appreciate the opportunities that come my way every day at Richer Poorer and the ownership I get to take in working towards a common goal. I never ever felt that at the job I was fired from. 

Name: Kim Lash

Occupation: Sr Manager of Brand Marketing + PR at Nasty Gal

HOW IT WENT DOWN: I was working at a men's clothing brand to launch their women's brand. I was around 26-29 yrs old during my time there. I had dedicated almost all of my time and the majority of my energy towards this job. In some ways I lost myself in it. I was surrounded by mostly males in the hip-hop/action sports industry and often felt a lot of pressure. I got to experience some incredible moments and work with really talented people, but I also faced a lot of challenges. I sensed that some company changes were being made. Then one day they called to tell me the female division of the brand was being outsourced and they were letting go of the internal team immediately. At the time it felt extremely disappointing to be losing something I had worked so hard to launch. I knew it had taken over my life excessively, but being let go was still upsetting. 

HOW IT FELT: Immediately after the job ended, I had a migraine for a week. I went to the doctor and she told me it was just stress. I had all this built up tension and it all came out when I stopped working there. I decided to take a couple weeks off before looking for a new role. During that time, I went to museums in LA I had never been to. I went to the beach alone. I felt my eyes were truly opened for the first time in a while. Then I started to interview for new jobs and was finding a lot more opportunities in New York. So after being in SoCal since I was six years old, I got up with no secured job and moved to NY. Shortly after being in NY, I got a job that was somewhat similar to my previous role. Then I decided to freelance. Most importantly I turned 30, I grew up, I found myself and I had a new perspective. 

WHERE ARE YOU NOW: I am back in-house with a fashion brand in LA. And I am more grounded, while still being extremely dedicated to my job with a strong work ethic.  By losing that job, I found how to respect myself. Ever since I have been much more fulfilled and better at my work.

“By losing that job, I found how to respect myself.”

Tweet this. 

ADVICE FOR WOMEN WHO ARE STRUGGLING TO REBOUND FROM GETTING FIRED: I know it's cliche, but I think everything happens for a reason. Even if it feels horrible at the time, you will learn from the situation and grow while figuring out your next opportunity. There are always going to be positions that aren't a fit and positions that are a fit. I would say to go with your gut when making decisions regarding a new role. And that the people in your network who know you best are a great way to land new promising work.

Name: Sable Yong

Occupation: Freelance Writer & Beauty Editor

HOW IT WENT DOWN: I was working for a women's site that I like to dub the poor man's Refinery29, as an associate beauty editor. I was mined-off LinkedIn from a recruiter at that company and met with the Editor-in-Chief of the site. I wasn't super hot about the site, but as a freelancer, I figured it'd be good experience and a "legit" resume builder and career move. Anyway, she left the company three months in and was replaced by the living incarnation of Regina George, who in my eight months at the company managed to systematically pick off everyone on the team who wasn't on her agenda. After about four straight months of conflicting direction from the now three supervisors above me, I was pretty much always made to feel like I wasn't doing enough. Anyway, some weird Wordpress glitch about unsaved edits was blamed on me, and I was unceremoniously let go one Monday afternoon being told, "you've been asked to improve your work many times and we aren't seeing it so we have to let you go."

HOW IT FELT: It was a sucky feeling, but I'd be lying if my first reaction didn't involve great relief. I couldn't really get into it at the time, and there was a stern HR lady present to mediate or witness, so I was just like "OK" and got my things and left. It was ultimately for the best because it was confirmation that I should stop trying to get into an industry I want to be a part of the traditional way (i.e., starting with grunt work from the bottom and grovel my way up) and use my actual skills. When I wasn't distracted by my daily existential dread I could actually use my energy towards doing something fulfilling and career advancing. 

THE TURNING POINT: When I went back to freelancing it was leagues better. I had greater insight into the inner-workings of the media/editorial world and way more editor and PR contacts. I was even, weirdly enough, mined from Google for a Dove campaign after their casting director found a story I wrote about dyeing my hair blonde. Generally, the pattern goes that any good opportunities that have come my way have been because of my own work that represents me, not a publication.

ADVICE FOR WOMEN WHO ARE STRUGGLING TO REBOUND FROM GETTING FIRED: Examine what you're really good at. Enjoy and do as much of that as you can, of your own volition. Marketing or positioning yourself to be perceived as someone experienced in whatever that thing is helps. Either way, I think when you approach what you want to do by playing to your strengths it works out better than trying to fit into someone else's mold. Also, always be saving your contacts.

Word to the Wise: “Always be saving your contacts.”

Tweet this. 

Name: Nicole (No Last Name Given)

Occupation: Screenwriter

HOW IT WENT DOWN: I was fired on January 8th, the Friday after the 2-week winter break that is the only obligatory hiatus that the entertainment business collectively takes. During this hiatus, my mom had intense back surgery and I got in back-to-back car accidents; I knew something in the universe was off. That Sunday, the last day of winter break, I walked into my mom's room and told her, "I hope I get fired tomorrow." Low and behold, that Friday, I got the boot. Sometimes I wonder if I willed it. That entire week I noticed I was being dropped off inter-office emails. Things were being scheduled I wasn't privy to, only to find out that they were interviewing my replacement right under my nose.

HOW IT FELT: Getting fired is a shock to the system, even if you do will it. You immediately feel inadequate and useless. Stressors like money and career come flooding in. You rack your brain about the things you did wrong (in my case, not many) and you think about what you could have done better. I was very close with these women, and one of them actually cried in the room. When I reflect on that, I think they knew they were losing a good team member, but ultimately we had to go our separate ways. I always felt grateful for the job and I worked for a team of creative and smart women who were running a big network television show. A door into Hollywood is a door. I felt very lucky, and I still do. 

“Getting fired is a shock to the system. You rack your brain about the things you did wrong.”

Tweet this.

THE TURNING POINT: When I was called in for the actual letting go, they gave me very vague reasons. "You know Nicole...it's just not a good fit anymore." Months later, it couldn't have been more clear. I hadn't written a single page of a screenplay. I hadn't been creating for TWO YEARS. My creative brain is a driven one and I needed to take the leap to see if I could actually thrive on my own. I would have never quit my job; a paycheck somehow always trumps the real work that needs to be done. I realize now I should have quit a long time ago, but I never had the courage. Despite by my affection for the women I worked with, I knew that they didn't value me creatively. I brought them a book that I thought would make an incredible animated series. They very quickly turned the idea down. It was then I knew that perhaps we just didn't vibe creatively. So I wrote a treatment for the series, kept it to myself, and now 8 months after being fired I am very happy to say that I am turning that same idea into a television series.

The week that followed my firing I made a full 9 to 5 commitment to screenwriting. I popped out two pilot scripts, finished my film, and got a series into serious development. I made a deal with myself: every single day, even on Sundays, I send at least one professionally intended e-mail, text or phone call. My main professional takeaway is to trust your own taste. Getting fired ,if anything, was just fodder for another good story.

Jane Helpern is a freelance writer, copywriter, and founder of Jane Says Agency. She enjoys helping brands find their voice, writing about fashion and feminism, and walking-at-an-incline-with-wine™

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Links We Love: A Hack, A Debate & More Celeb Love for Chrissy Teigen

Didn't have time to read this week? Don't worry we didn't either. Now take a seat, read up, and get ready for Monday's monumental debate. 

Hillary Clinton gets the Between Two Ferns treatment. And manages to hold her own.  

STEM is the future. Even Cards Against Humanity knows it.  Does that make them for humanity?

Have a rough commute? A court has ruled that time spent traveling to and from work, is work. 

Put 'em up ladies and gents. Are you ready for Monday night's major debate?

Yahoo is the latest company to be hacked. And they got hacked hard. 

Retire? Not women. This study says women work four years longer than men. 

Forget the iPhone 7. These Apple employees are claiming mental health issues from a hostile work environment. 

Ain't no basketball wife. Ayesha Curry is the woman next to, not behind her husband. Oh, and like the rest of us, she loves Chrissy Teigen. 

These CEOs say devoting time to reading every damn day will help you work smarter. (You're welcome in advance for these links.) 

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This One Productivity Hack Will Change Your Entire Work Day

@stephivelez

It's not just quantity when it comes to sleep, it's quality.  Your brain needs those zzzs more than you know to be your most productive and it's something that Sleep Number Chief Strategy and Customer Relationship Officer Melissa Barra knows plenty about. 

Studies have endlessly shown that pulling all-nighters is bad for business and that sleep health is key to mental and physical well-being. 

Melissa, who has a Sleep Number setting of 30, shared that "quality sleep is essential for health and for performance. Sleep affects all aspects of our life – from mental agility, to physical activity, to general wellness.  I am excited to see the beginnings of a cultural shift that recognizes that sleep at the center of a healthy life.  A person that sleeps well performs better!"

WE KNOW PERFORMANCE AT WORK IS AFFECTED BY SLEEP

Like most of us, Melissa says that she feels a difference at work when she doesn't get enough shut-eye. "Sleep is core to performance in every part of my life.” 

"When I’ve had a good night’s sleep, I feel energized, alert and more creative. My problem-solving and decision-making skills are better."

Some of us think we don't need more than five hours. Others think if we don't look at what time we finally close our eyes, we can trick ourselves into thinking we slept longer. But the body knows and so does your brain the next day. Skimping on sleep means skimping on you. 

The right kind of sleep also matters. So...

IF YOU'RE NOT SURE HOW YOU’RE DOING, TRACK YOUR SLEEP

If you lay in bed, wide-awake tossing and turning, you’re not getting quality and restful sleep. A restless state of sleep can have damaging effects on the next day's productivity. 

Melissa explains, "Because I track my sleep, I know that on days I haven’t sleep well, it ends up being the start of a vicious cycle. My workout isn’t as powerful; I don’t eat as well as I typically do; and my productivity suffers! Knowing and feeling that difference really drives me to try to get the best sleep I possibly can."

"A restless state of sleep can have damaging effects on the next day's productivity." 

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Tracking your sleep can help you with your sleep goals, which in turn will help you with your career goals. 

WAYS TO PROTECT YOUR SLEEP

Studies have shown that consuming caffeine six hours before you plan to hit the hay can have haywire effects. You may be technically asleep, but void of the full benefits you should enjoying.

"While I love coffee, I won’t drink it after 3 p.m. because I know caffeine will still be in my system by the time I go to bed and can disrupt my sleep," says Melissa.

Likewise research has found that exposure to the blue light from phones, tablets, and other screens can disrupt sleep and the content can lead to a ‘racing mind’.  Melissa addresses this issue by shutting "down my email and texts one hour before I go to sleep – this also helps me wind down from the day and protects my sleep."

REMEMBER: THE HUSTLE DOES SLEEP 

If you want your brain to be on it's best behavior, you have to treat your body right. 

"I feel most productive on the mornings when I’ve gotten great quality sleep," says Melissa. "When I arrive at the office before anyone else is there. I find that I get my best thinking and best work done during that time."  

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4 Positive Steps to Take When You're Denied a Raise

Men make more money than women in the workplace (most of the time).

We know this. It's an issue that has been widely discussed. Just this morning HuffPo released a spoof vid with actress Kristen Bell who touts the benefits of "Pinksourcing" on camera. In the bit Bells says women are "the cheapest, most affordable workforce in America!" AH, THE PAY GAP. It's so funny, except it's not. (It's so much easier to cry into a dollar than 77 cents.) 

One of the often cited reasons for the imbalance is that women are less likely than men to negotiate their wages, i.e. we don't ask. 

Well, not according to a new study published this month showing that that women do ask, they simply don't get. According to Broadly, "After analyzing the information submitted by approximately 4,600 employees over the span of 840 workplaces, researchers found 'no statistical difference' in the likelihood of male and female workers asking for a raise while working with their current employer." 

Researchers discovered that men were 25 percent more likely to receive a pay increase when they asked. 

So what do you do when you ask for a raise and the answer is NO? Here are a few ways to move on and up past the let down. 

ASK YOUR BOSS WHAT STEPS TO TAKE TO WORK TOWARD A RAISE 

So the big B said no. It's rough, however sometimes you’re going to be denied a raise because you don't meet the criteria to receive a raise. We know. If you're asking for a raise you think you deserve one, but you have to be open to the idea that you overlooked a few considerations. 

Or you might have just been doing an okay job without going beyond your role. 

Ask your boss or supervisor where you need to improve and how you can be a more valuable asset to the company. Chances are if you ask how you can improve and grow, your salary will too.

Keep track of everything.

SET CAREER GOALS FOR YOURSELF

Once you've asked about specific areas that need work, set goals and milestones for yourself in the workplace. If you’re up for it, encourage your boss to have review meetings to ensure you’re on the right path.

Be proactive towards your own promotion.

Maxie McCoy, the woman on a mission to inspire millions says, "When you have a clear answer you can do a few things. You can: A) work with your boss and their bosses on a roadmap for getting your output to match the salary you're desiring, B) consider if this is really the right role or company given you have certain value expectations for what you're putting in, C) assess if it's total sexist bullshit OR D) create a counter offer to see if 'no' is really 'no.'"

"DENIED A RAISE? CREATE A COUNTER OFFER TO SEE IF 'NO IS REALLY 'NO.'"

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DON'T LET REJECTION DISCOURAGE YOU 

You didn’t get the raise, but don’t let the rejection discourage you. A “no” is just another reason to move forward.

The worst thing you can do is let the rejection negatively manifest in your work, which will for sure not help. Grow from the no and survive the rejection.

"GROW FROM THE NO AND SURVIVE THE REJECTION."

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If worst comes to worst take your talents to South Beach like LeBron James and find a new job that will truly value your skill set. 

Latham Thomas, founder of Mama Glow says this: 

"You know the value you bring to your company- you also are well aware of your self worth. When you ask for a raise and don’t get it, you may have a slew of questions running through your head. The key is rather than to internalize the 'the NO' and start doubting your capabilities and strengths, use it as an opportunity to get a better understanding of how your boss and the decision makers view your particular situation and the surrounding factors. That will give you a clarity and a better idea of what was at play when they made their decision. This awareness can ultimately assist you in getting what you want and where you want to be much faster." 

KEEP YOUR OPTIONS OPEN 

If you know that you’ve gone above and beyond for this job and have sacrificed so much to elevate the company and your position, and still no raise? It’s time to find a new job. 

Jobs need to work for us-- we don't only need to work for them. 

If your current job isn’t meeting your career goals, there’s no harm in keeping your options open.

Make sure that if that’s the case you maintain your work ethic at your current job and hold steady on that solid reputation. You don’t want to get caught up in petty office drama because you didn’t get a raise - it’s not a good look and it’ll come back and bite you when you’re looking for your next gig.

Keep it professional and keep moving on. 

For our NYC readers!! They've got more carreer advice! Catch Latham Thomas + Maxie McCoy LIVE in NYC for their popular workshop 7 Practices for a Gratifying Career

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10 Steps to Have the Best Morning, Every Morning

With the hustle and bustle of life it’s easy to push aside the true importance of a morning routine. Even though waiting until the last second to crawl out of bed and rushing out of the apartment with spilling coffee in one hand while emailing with the other is of the norm it’s not a beneficial way to start the day. The basic fundamental is this; you have to set yourself up for success if you are serious about achieving your goals. Taking care of yourself mentally is just as important as taking care of yourself physically. If it isn’t already, it should be a priority to start off your day on the best foot possible.

Here are 6 simple adjustments to make to your morning routine that will have a huge impact on your day:

GO TO SLEEP AT THE SAME TIME EVERY NIGHT

Maintaining a consistent sleep schedule is the first step in waking up ready to kick ass. I know that it's one of things that is easier said then done, especially when you get sucked into Stranger Things, but getting your body on a sleep schedule is like winning a gold medal. Give your brain the suggested seven to eight hours of sleep to decompress so when you rise you are ready to grind.

SET YOUR ALARM 15 MINUTES EARLIER 

Giving yourself the coveted extra 15 minutes in the morning will make you feel like a whole new person. Instead of hitting your alarm and rushing to get out of bed and speed out of the house like a mad person soak up the time to stretch and mentally prepare yourself for the day ahead.

NO CELL PHONES ALLOWED

I recently set a new rule for myself: I will not check emails + social media until my feet hit the floor in the morning and from my personal experience I can tell you it absolutely changes how I start off my day. I used to lay in bed and before my eye balls were even fully opened I would be multi tasking between double taping a Insta post I missed while dreaming and reading emails that make me want to throw my phone across the room. So, before I even got up to brush my teeth the mood of my day would already be set because of someone else. No ma’am, no more of that!  Your morning should be reserved just for you. Do yourself a favor and before you go to sleep turn off the notifications on your phone so when you wake up and roll over to turn off your alarm you aren’t bombarded by technology before you even realize it’s time to wake up!

MAKE YOUR BED 

Turns out your mom had a reason behind nagging you every single morning before school. Making your bed helps you get started on a productive path before you even walk out the front door. Starting your day off on the right foot, with a made bed, will put you in gear to check off your to-do list.

#QOTD

Reading a motivational quote every morning can provide a solid framework for the day ahead. Soaking in positive words will motivate you to stay in the right direction and not get detoured by negative thinking.

BUT FIRST...

I know that drinking coffee is what all the cool kids do but I have news for you, there is something else you should be drinking in the morning. Do yourself a favor and swap out coffee for lemon water. Lukewarm water with fresh squeezed lemon juice has numerous benefits; starts your metabolism, cleanses your mouth and throat and also gives you that extra kick of energy that you may need in the AM. If you’re looking for a dash of daily detox, add a tiny amount of cayenne pepper to the water.

PEP TALK 

Sometimes you just have to look yourself in the mirror and give yourself the pep talk,”Hello beautiful. You’re a bad ass babe, you got this. Love you.” I’m not even trying to be funny, you gotta do what you gotta do! The world can be a big bad scary place sometimes so reminding yourself that you got your back isn’t the worst idea.

SWEAT IT OUT

There is no denying that starting off your day with a killer workout helps set the mood for the day. If you are one of those people (guilty) that can get up and check a workout off the list before the sun rises then all the more power to you. If you prefer to work out after work, I won’t judge you too much ;) either way, getting a little movement in before breakfast is always a good idea. Suggestions? A two-minute plank or 20 jumping jacks; whatever gets your blood moving.

SPREAD THE LOVE 

Whether you’re kissing your dog, roommate, boyfriend or calling your mom,spreading love provides you with a positive start and keeps you focused on what’s really important, even through the stressful days.

SET + INTENTIONS

You don’t want to do all the above just to walk out the door unsure about your next move. What is top priority? What will make you feel most accomplished by the time you lay your head back down on your pillow? What is the one thing you should do today that will get you one step closer to your goal? Whatever those answers are, make it happen. No excuses.

"ALWAYS REMEMBER TO FALL ASLEEP WITH A DREAM AND WAKE UP WITH A PURPOSE."

rise and shine,

chels

Chelsea Briche runs the popular blog The Millennial Miss. A platform for young women surviving their twenties with grace and a lot of humility. The platform is Chelsea's "pledge to you, the ones who haven’t quite figured it all out yet. That we, together, will immerse ourselves in every single thing possible; explore, love a lot, love a little, and never touch the ground."

An original version of this story appeared on Millennial Miss. 

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Hey Lauren: How Do I Avoid the Dangers of Like-Chasing?

"Hey, Lauren" is our new bi-monthly column from licensed psychologist Dr. Lauren Hazzouri.  Dr. Hazzouri is a TV show host and founder at Hazzouri Psychology, where she’s carved out a successful niche treating women who are psychologically healthy—but trying hard and not getting satisfaction in various aspects of their lives. Through her life experience and training, Lauren’s developed a program that allows women to live meaningful lives and feel fulfilled doing it. Lauren is founder of HeyLauren.com, a project for women, where she provides evidence-based insights on job stress, relationship woes and everything in between.

Taking a cue from society, millennials put undue pressure on themselves to get on the right path to meet their purpose—today! Long gone are the days of getting a boring, mundane job that builds life-skills and pays the rent upon graduation. This generation is all about the greater good, fulfillment and branding themselves and their ideas! The problem is that often times, personal branding begins without having had the variety of experiences, relationships, and time to get comfortable in their own skin and really shore-up a sense of self. 

This dilemma, what I refer to the cart before the horse quandary, puts millennial women at risk of being ultimately vulnerable to the appraisal of others, leading to what I call Like chasing, the never-ending altering, morphing, and becoming (not first-rate versions of themselves) second-rate versions of established brands and images that people and society Like a million plus times a day. 

When we see that Kim Kardashian gets zillions of likes for this and Kylie doesn’t get as many for that, we naturally accommodate our personal repertoire. This cognitive process has been explained by social-learning theory for decades. It certainly isn’t rooted in "Keeping Up with the Kardashians." Research tells us that likes trigger the reward center of the brain, reinforcing and perpetuating our behaviors on social. We want to be liked!—and that’s okay. It’s just part of the human-condition and there’s no shame in the human game!

But, there’s a big difference between nurturing the self and building a brand. It appears that we’re exhaustively instructing millennial women how to brand themselves without providing insight on how to be themselves, hence the obsession with appealing to “the market.” Think about it— In order to be successful, a brand must be “directly connected to consumer needs, emotions, and competitive environments.” And, millennial women are doing just that ( with themselves, competing with each other!). Ergo, they morph into what the consumer ( i.e., follower) responds to in a positive way—rebranding after rebranding, Like chasing. 

"There’s a big difference between nurturing the self and building a brand."

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It makes perfect sense! As human-beings we long to be a part of and are hard-wired to respond to things socially. We also long to be seen but fear being seen in a critical way. So, branding allows us to exercise control over how and when we’re seen by others. Of course, it would like a win-win. If only it were that easy!

It’s important to remember that social media changes how we interact with our social environment, not how we develop as human-beings. To be fulfilled, we must respect ourselves and others, have the ability to connect in a meaningful way and become our true selves—regardless of the number of likes! 

Only your true self can make your unique contribution to the world, and that’s the reason you started branding yourself and your ideas in the first place. Isn’t it? Great, so let’s get started. 

A LITTLE PERSPECTIVE PLEASE!

Spend less time painting a public-self portrait and more time becoming your ideal-self ( the person you want to be). Of course, you can document your journey with several selfies, but it’s important to be aware that this journey is on you, for you—not about you, for your followers.

IT’S ALL ABOUT YOU

The goal is to take responsibility for ourselves and our lives by acting in our environment much the same way we would respond in a vacuum with no outside influences. In life, we can only control what we say and do. Much of the time, to respond appropriately, we must wait for our emotions to dissipate and our rational mind to resurface. It’s been said that our power lies in the space between stimulus and response.

"Our power lies in the space between stimulus and response."

Tweet this. 

Becoming familiar with that space is so important. It allows us to hold on to our power, to ourselves!

BECOME THE PUPPETEER ( VS. THE PUPPET!)

Use the reinforcement to get you where you want to be! Now that you know that the reward center of your brain is triggered with the likes you receive on social media, only post pics of you doing things that close the gap between your real self ( who you are today) and your ideal self ( the person you want to become). Instead of posting pics that capture your night out, post pics on your journey of personal growth and development.

GET FAMILIAR WITH YOUR THOUGHTS

Thoughts lead to feelings and feelings lead to behavior. Each of us has many thoughts, up to 70,000 per day! The goal is to get so familiar with your thoughts that you can instantly recognize the irrational thoughts—those making you feel down, scared or worried, or like you need to Keep up with the Kardashians! Once you know which thought patterns cause the unwanted feelings, you can change them. If you change how you think, you can change how you feel and how you behave.

REFLECT ON YOUR CORE BELIEFS

At times, the old, negative, irrational way of thinking can be stubborn. Some thought patterns can be resistant to change because of what we believe about ourselves, other people, life in general and the future. Fortunately, you can choose what you believe. Change your Core Belief from “I’m stupid,” to “I’m smart.” Then, act as if! Do the things that smart people do—read, watch documentaries, discuss ideas vs people. In doing smart people things, you learn ( you get smarter). And, just like that— “I’m smart!”

Following these tips will get you on the path to becoming your true self, one that’s resilient to the influences of social media and can make your unique contribution to the world. From my perspective, that’s something worth branding!

###

Dr. Lauren’s on a mission to bring psychology to the public. She contributes to a variety of online publications, provides candid talks to women’s organizations across the country, and was recently cited in Forbes. Lauren’s next appearance is on September 9, when she will deliver a Ted Talk entitled Life Works. Her talk is said to highlight various aspects of the book she’s currently writing on “how to do the human-being thing really well.” 

Dr. Lauren is the 2016 recipient of The Psychology in the Media Award from The Pennsylvania Psychological Association and is a member of The American Psychological Association. For more from Lauren, visit @dr_lauren  and sign up for her weekly newsletter at HeyLauren.com.

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3 Ways to Maintain Excellence in the Workplace

The words that every eager job seeker yearns to hear amidst ongoing applications and interviews are: You’re hired.

The relief that comes when the human resources department of your desired company calls and informs you that you’ve been selected for the position is positively overwhelming. A megawatt smile stretches its way across your face and you liken your emotions to The Little Engine That Could.

But after dedicating a significant amount of time to the position and mastering the ins and outs of the workplace — and observing the politics of the business — you begin to notice that you are exceeding the expectations of the role and are not being properly compensated for it. Whether the sought after compensation is verbal praise, an increased salary, leniency on hours, or additional gifted days off, your toleration threshold has lowered and the undervalued itch begins to scratch.

Though it can be easy to complain to coworkers, abandon your role and run for the hills of another company, slack off in your position, or unashamedly and inappropriately wear your emotions on your sleeve, none of these quick fixes allow you to nurture one of the most valuable and respected employee traits: character.

As eager and driven employees, our goals are set to move from point A to point B as quickly as possibly. While drive is necessary and healthy, the workforce journey is much more than just an increased annual salary and a title change on your business card. The ups and downs that your career will take you on can teach and refine you as an individual … if you let them. Character is so rarely praised, yet is integral in leading a healthy staff and propelling a business for success.

"...the workforce journey is much more than just an increased annual salary and a title change on your business card."

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In your waiting to switch jobs or for increased compensation, and between those moments of great exasperation and defeat, choose to build and strengthen your character. From character, excellence overflows and the desire to endlessly perform to your best becomes priority.

Here are three ways to maintain excellence in your workplace:

WORK TOWARD YOUR NEXT JOB

Though you may feel you’ve mastered all you can in your current position, challenge yourself with tasks that can translate over to your next job. If you finish a task early, ask your boss for additional projects that you can apply your own creativity to. Be willing to extend yourself outside of what you know and learn skills that your next position may require. Keep in mind that your portfolio is a reflection of you, so be proud of what you showcase to future employers and perfect as many skills as possible in your present position.

LEAVE A COMPANY ON A POSITIVE NOTE

The last way that you would want an employer to remember you is negatively. You may be in the process of interviewing for outside positions, but intentionally maintain a positive attitude while at your current company. You have worked hard in your role and want the option of listing your supervisor as a reference further on down the line. Industries are small and your path with current employees may cross later on, so choose a positive attitude that reflects integrity and character.

REALIZE THAT LIFE IS MORE

 It can be easy to find self-worth in your job title and salary, but true meaning and purpose are not dependent on your resume or monetary worth. People are why the workforce functions, so focus on nurturing and maximizing those relationships and networks. If there is an individual at your company that you admire, grab lunch with them and pick their brain. Perhaps you have a coworker that is struggling with something outside of work — ask them how they’re holding up and invite them out for coffee. You may never be in the same circles again with the people that currently surround you, so maximize the time that you have with them.

Though the feeling of defeat can overtake us at times, seek the positive in your current role. Character is widely valuable to you as an individual and is something that can never be taken away by an employer, no matter how undervalued they make you feel. Strive to attain it.

Have you struggled in certain role at work? What did you learn from it?

The original version of this article appeared on Darling Magazine. 

Image via Marlena Pearl Photography

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Why Nicole Richie Would Make the Best BFF

Inventor. Artist. Ex-Girlfriend. Australian. These are all titles Nicole Richie took on in season 2 of her VH1 series "Candidly Nicole." But while it's universally accepted that Richie is a quick-witted comedic Queen, capable of the above and more, she also takes her businesses (multiple), her friendships (more than multiple), and her role as mother (just 2) very seriously. 

Almost nine years ago Richie launched House of Harlow 1960, shortly after the birth of her first child, becoming mom and mom to her career simultaneously.

“At that time I had so many fears,” she says. “I had a newborn baby. I was twenty-six. I was starting a new business. I was one of three people that I knew with a baby that was my age. I had no idea what the future would bring. I didn’t even know if I wanted to turn it into a full-blown brand yet.” 

Which, is exactly what is has become. The initial 50-piece costume jewelry line has developed into ready-to-wear, eyewear, footwear, and handbags. The most recent collection was released in partnership with Revolve. 

Though entrepreneur wasn't exactly a role she imagined for herself, Richie got a taste of that business life, liked it, and last November held the inaugural Pearl xChange in Los Angeles. It is her live-event series for women who want to make connections, share knowledge, and listen to speakers like Gwyneth Paltrow and Marianne Williamson drop some. 

At first glance, it’s very similar to Create & Cultivate. That’s not a problem for Richie, who was a keynote at Create & Cultivate Atlanta in conversation with HelloGiggles co-founder Sophia Rossi. 

“This is a perfect example,” Richie says, “of how two people in the same business with the same interests understand that we each have strengths. Joining together only helps us spread our wings, reach even more people, build the energy and make the vibration stronger.”

“Joining together only helps us spread our wings, build the energy and make the vibration stronger.”

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It’s the matter of competition being able to life us higher, together, not further apart and it’s a direction she’s focussing a lot of her energy. “I am able to see other people’s strengths where I have weaknesses. That’s not putting myself down, that’s understanding who I am and wanting to build myself up and make myself stronger. I’m so excited to be a part of the Create & Cultivate conference and spend time with other like-minded people who have been in this business longer than me.”

This approach is a through-line with Richie and many of her successful friends. 

“Rachel Zoe is an example of a woman where there are a lot of parallels in our careers,” says Richie. “That being said, do we look at each other as competition? Absolutely not. Rachel is Rachel and I’m me. We’re two individuals. We have different lives. I’m so happy for her and I love going out and supporting her." 

“Rachel has been very open with me,” she adds, “and this is very important to say, she’s been so open about the ins and outs of her business. She's never once said, ‘You’re on your own.’”

This approach has only helped them both. You can do it by yourself, Richie explains, “but you’re really limiting yourself. I can only get so far on my own."

She brings up longtime friend Sophia Rossi, who likewise understands the sisterhood of business. “Her business is HelloGiggles," says Richie. "It’s online, it’s so different than what I do, but we have found ways to collaborate and I’m really passionate about my friendship with her. She’s somebody who is a true connector. She has no skin in the fashion game, but she loves me and she wants to see her friends succeed.” Friends like Clique Media co-founder Katherine Power. “Sophia started a few years after Katherine, but she is the first person to say, ‘I just copied everything Katherine did. I listened to everything she said and she was my mentor.’” 

“Those girls are the perfect example of two friends going after kind of the same thing but who have done nothing but support each other and maintain the closeness. You’re never going to produce the same thing, it’s just not possible. We don’t have the same souls.”

With Pearl xChange Richie wants to take this notion a step further. “When I hear other girls say, ‘Oh, I don’t have a lot of girlfriends,’ or ‘I don’t trust other girls,” I, personally, don’t understand what that means,” she says. “We have to get over that. It has to be a thing of the past and it’s really important to me. To say, or ask, ‘How can I help?’ ‘What can I give?’ and ‘What is the one thing that I have that I can offer?’”

She brings up advice Marianne Williams gave the audience at the first Pearl xChange. “She spoke a lot about us understanding our own strengths and how that takes more confidence than we know. Feeling good within ourselves about what we have to offer— that’s harder than a lot of people think.”

Adding, “There is no how-to book, but the idea of ‘this is how you do it’ can be thrown out. You can create your own way.”

“The idea of ‘this is how you do it’ can be thrown out. You can create your own way.”

Tweet this. 

In her thirties Nicole feels more confident and secure in her decisions, her "own way," than ever before. That means exploring and pushing herself and finding new sides of who she is. “You really have to put yourself out there, give everything that you have, and do it authentically.” 

“It’s been a slow and steady process of me finding the confidence in myself to take the reigns of my own business and my own life.” 

“I think the key is to find the thing that you love and figure out how to turn that into a business. And just be that. Don’t worry about being anything else. Then you’ll feel like your life has alignment and true flow.” 

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You're a Freelancer and You Lost a Client, Now What?

The freelance world is full of competition. (Read up as to why we think a little competition among women is more than OK.) 

Sometimes you’re competing against other freelancers and sometimes you’re competing against yourself. Like when a steady client all of the sudden PULLS the PLUG and you’re left scrambling to cover your monthly nut. (Click here for key financial rules to follow at any age.)

When it’s you against your bank account, we want you to come out on top. 

Because it doesn’t matter how great you are at your job or how well you interface with clients, it happens to the best of us. Directions and budgets change. The people who hired you leave positions and bring on a new person. Sometimes the relationship has simply expired. 

Here are four ways that will keep you from getting lanced by the roller coaster world of working for yourself. 

WORK IT OUT WITH UPWORK 

Great people can be hard to find, so make yourself findable with the world’s largest online workplace. Upwork has over 5 million registered clients who post over 3 million jobs annually. The site also boasts over a billion dollars worth of work done annually. That’s money going into other pockets. 

You apply, create a profile that focusses on your very niche (and very impressive) skills, and start hunting. Browse jobs in over ten different fields, from writing to design and creative. There’s a new job out there for you, so go find it. 

2. BE AS COLD AS ICE

Sometimes jobs find us but most freelancers have to find the job. It's called a hustle. 

So you lost one job? Use it as a reason to find two more. Build a list of one hundred clients that you want to work for and reach out. The most successful “cold” emails offer a service instead of asking a question. 

"The most successful cold emails offer a service instead of asking a question."

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Don’t ask if someone is hiring, show them with data and specific examples of what you can do for them. Karin Eldor, self-employed copywriter and social media strategist says this of cold contacting: “Hit up the job boards of the brands you love most to see if there are any postings for your skill-set, and fire off those applications and emails.  

She adds, “Set a goal of reaching out to four contacts per day -- the wider your net, the more likely you'll get some bites. The key to cold emailing and increasing the chance of a reply is making your email short and to the point: start with flattery, then hit 'em up with your expertise in a short tagline about yourself. You need to intro what you do, what your specialty is, and how you can help them.”

3. FOCUS ON WHAT’S WORKING, TO MAKE SURE YOU KEEP WORKING

“Losing a steady client can shake you to the core,” says Karin. But all freelancers agree that going negative is as bad as going dark. 

Jane Helpern, writer, copywriter, and editorial director living in LA, says it's “Easier said than done but try not to take it personally. Don't waste your time wondering what went wrong, or if it's something you did. It's endlessly more productive to focus on improving one aspect of your professional package, whether it's refreshing your website, tightening up your social media presence, or tricking out your desk setup. It's kind of like a revenge body, but for your career.”

"Focus on improving one aspect of your professional package. It's kind of like a revenge body, but for your career.”

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4. SIGN UP FOR NEWSLETTERS

Unsubscribe from everything that's wasting your time and sign up for everything that will advance your finances. From our Create & Cultivate Classifieds to ilovecreatives job boards. 

Karin says, “sign up for newsletters from freelance-oriented websites and make sure to visit job boards that list contractual gigs, on the daily -- it's a freelance world, and we're just living in it. We have big love for ilovecreatives lately, as they send weekly digital classifieds for creatives.” 

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Top 5 Things to Remember When You’re Searching for a Job

photo credit: Sugar & Cloth

Looking for a new job is hard. It's as simple as that, and it’s easy to forget these top 5 things to remember when you're searching. You may be working long hours at a day job while searching for the career of your dreams, or you may have left a job only to spend countless hours searching for a new position. Whatever situation you may be in, you’re not alone.

Searching for a job can be a long and tedious process, and it's easy to feel dejected, however it is important to keep your spirits up and remember that everything always works itself out. It doesn't make it any easier at the time, but often when you look back upon a time you were struggling, you'll see how far you've progressed. To make it a little easier on you, I've rounded up the top 5 things to remember when you're searching for a job:

DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY, AND TRY TO LOOK AT THINGS FROM A DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE

You may have applied to hundreds or thousands of jobs, and it's easy to get down on yourself, but it's always important to look at things from a different perspective. You have no idea who's on the other end, sifting through applications. Sometimes jobs are only posted for legal reasons, even when the company has a candidate in mind. Don't take it personally if you don't hear from an online job application. Chances are that it has nothing to do with you!

REMEMBER THAT YOU’RE LIKELY ONE OF HUNDREDS OR THOUSANDS OF APPLICANTS 

Because we have such easy access to job postings through online job sites such as LinkedIn, it is very common to be one of hundreds or thousands of applicants. The problem is that even if you’re completely qualified and would be a great candidate for the position, you may get passed over due to the sheer volume of candidates applying. Often there are so many applicants that determining which candidates should move forward is like finding a needle in a haystack. Be patient, make your application great, and don’t make the mistake of thinking that you’re the only person to apply.

"Be patient, make your application great, and don’t make the mistake of thinking that you’re the only person to apply."

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DON’T APPLY TO EVERY JOB UNDER THE SUN

Recruiters call this tactic “spray and pray,” and it’s not a tactic that anyone in the hiring industry would recommend. Contrary to popular belief, applying to more jobs is not better. The quality of each application you submit is much more important than the quantity. It’s much better to apply to a few jobs that you really want, and focus on customizing your resume and cover letter to each position than to cast wide net and apply to a lot of jobs with the same resume and cover letter. 

When you use the same general resume and cover letter to apply to a plethora of jobs, recruiters and hiring managers can tell. By using terms such as “your company” instead of actually writing out the company name, or not referencing specific aspects of the company and/or job description, it becomes transparent that you’re using that resume and cover letter to apply everywhere.

What’s wrong with that? It gives off the notion that you’re too lazy to customize your documents, and that you don’t care about the company which you’re applying for. Make sure you show the hiring manager and/or recruiter who you really are and pour your soul into each application. It may be a pain at the time, but your effort will show through and benefit you.

YOU HAVE TO WANT IT, AND SHOW OTHERS THAT YOU WANT IT

I often see people who are applying for jobs they aren’t super excited about, and it is always very apparent in their applications. When on a job search, you have to be determined and know what you want. If you want something bad enough and work hard enough to get there, it will show through in your resume, cover letter, interview, and overall actions. Companies want to hire people who know what they want and will work their butt off to get there. If you’re neck in neck with another candidate, a company will almost always choose the candidate who wants it more. If you’re passionate, you’ll work harder, and that’s what kind of employees companies want to hire. If you can show how much you want the position in your application, you’ll always have good results.

DON’T BE AFRAID TO USE YOUR CONNECTIONS 

This is one of the biggest mistakes people make. A lot of people seem to be afraid of using their connections because they don’t want it to appear as though they got the position because of who they know. It’s not ideal to be handed a job just because you know someone with authority, but reaching out to people you know in a similar field or work in a company you want to work for is always a good idea. 

There may be a job opportunity coming up that you would only hear about through an internal source. You’ll still need to submit a resume and go through the application process, but reaching out to a contact could present you with a new opportunity that you had no idea existed. Remember that if you won’t reach out and use your connections, there are plenty of people who will, and they will be the ones to hear about new opportunities before anyone else. Chances are that you will never regret reaching out to a connection to let them know you’re looking for a job.

It can be hard to keep your spirits up during a job search, but remember that countless people are facing the same struggles as you, and at some point or another, every single person has been there. Take advantage of free time if you have it, and become the best version of yourself. Take a class, do some volunteer work, and polish your application package. No one will look down upon you for taking time to improve yourself. Regardless of how you’re handling your job search, don’t forget about these top 5 things to remember when you're searching for a job.

A native San Franciscan, Michele Lando is a Certified Professional Resume Writer and founder of writestylesonline.com. She has a passion for helping others present the best version of themselves, both on paper and in person, and works to polish individuals' application package and personal style. Aiming to help create a perfect personal branding package, Write Styles presents tips to enhance your resume, style, and boost your confidence.

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4 Steps to Keeping Your Voice in the Online World

photo credit: Irida Mete

By Alisa Nelson

What’s the difference between copying an idea and stealing it?

I was taught by a math professor but the deeper concept holds true across the board. The difference between copying someone’s idea and stealing it is that stealing involves your own creativity and voice as you adapt the idea into your specific context. When we are copying, we are trying to fit the pieces of someone else's life into our own. The result is commonly to give up or lose momentum and I believe it happens for two reasons:

1. Since it wasn’t your goal or vision to begin with, you don’t really know why you’re going after it so when the road gets a bit bumpy, you don’t have that deep soul drive that helps you keep going and you don’t know what you’re supposed to do next. It's like following step-by-step instructions that don't account for your specific situation. 

2. You get a little ways down this new path and realize you lost your own voice. Creativity stalls because you aren’t speaking (or living) in a way that shows who you are. 

It’s difficult to be vulnerable when they aren’t your words and as Brené Brown has shown us, vulnerability is crucial for creativity and innovation. Copying someone else’s vulnerability - even if they are a close match - will leave you feeling dried up in the end.

"Copying someone else’s vulnerability will leave you feeling dried up in the end."

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I write on this from the perspective of a newer online entrepreneur who struggles to stay focused on my own brand as I try to reach my own audience. Maybe you can relate? Our own uniqueness means that we can do similar things and yet speak from a totally different perspective. But we like lists. We want someone to come alongside us and tell us how to turn who we are into a business - or at least a cohesive message. Remember what I said about vulnerability? Bringing who you are, including your need for growth and maturation of your brand, is the best way to spark your creativity and this allows you to actually reach the people you want to reach and influence their lives. From experience, simply copying how other people use Instagram or their writing style won’t get you their results.

So how do you go about staying focused on your brand amidst the overstimulation of the online business world?

1. Write a clear and specific mission statement that includes your target audience and what you are trying to inspire them to do

2. Filter every new idea - blog post, product, social media theme, etc - through that mission statement.

3. Look for the principles behind the success of your online peers - rather than copying their method, identify the bigger ideas that fuel their success. Do they have killer headlines? Do they share personal stories? What kind of value do they offer to their audience? Once you spot the bigger concept, seek to grow your own capability in that area so you can apply it to your brand without losing what makes you unique.

4. Go back to your personal WHY. Why did you start your blog? Why do you love what you do? Remind yourself frequently and let your creativity flow from your confidence in the message you are standing behind.

These steps can seem silly when you’re “on” - you know, when you’re motivated, brainstorming, and getting tons of engagement from your audience. The advantage to having a written out mission statement is for the moments when you aren’t getting engagement. When ideas aren’t coming and you feel like you’re floundering for inspiration. Rather than reaching for social media and looking at what everyone else is doing, dare to take a step back. Go outside, let your mind wander, and get back in touch with your WHY. For me, that has occasionally meant dropping the direction I had been moving in so I can do a course correction. Other times, it’s just staying quiet on social media for a brief period as I refocus. In the end, consistency is only valuable if it is bringing you closer to your desired outcome.

What do you do when you start to lose vision? What habits do you use to stay consistent while maintaining your voice and personal creativity? Share in the comments below. 

An original version of this article appeared on Blog Society. 

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